sarah’s adventure

Posted on January 18, 2016 by Shanda

We took Sarah to the hospital on Wednesday morning. She had to be there at 6:10. They took us in the pre-op room and I changed her into a hospital gown. We were so nervous. The nurse and doctors came and talked to us and then it was time for her to go to the operating room. Rich went with her until she fell into her magical sleep. They let her chose a flavored chap stick to rub on the mask so that it smelled nice as she breathed. She chose watermelon.

Her surgery ended up taking 8 hours. Rich and I went to a waiting room. I walked in with my mind numb and my eyes hot with tears. I wanted to hide away from the other parents. Rich and I hugged, he was crying, too. He had a hard time leaving Sarah behind and went back to kiss her one more time before he left here there so small and dear.

How did we wait 8 long hours? The time went by so slowly but as I think back on it, it is unclear in my mind how we passed the time. We sat right next to the waiting room phone and I answered it on the first ring every time the nurses called to update the parents. So we heard from the O.R. on a regular basis.

I also walked and walked, through the halls and up and down flights of stairs.

I went to the bathroom over and over…being nervous always makes my heart beat faster and my bladder want to empty more frequently.

Each time I washed my hands, I looked myself in the eyes and spoke words of affirmation to myself. “You are strong, you are so strong.” “Jesus is with you and Sarah is going to be fine.” “Everything is okay.” “Be positive.” It felt good to purposefully replace negative thinking with positive words.

I went into the Meditation room where there was a book to write your words of prayer, and Bibles to read (a Torah, 4 books of Mormon, and a Hebrew Old Testament). I prayed in there with my face in my hands. I wrote in the book the words to “Jesus Loves the Little Children.”

I sat by my husband who was working on his laptop, and colored. There was one other mom in the waiting room who also colored. It helped to keep me calm.

I watched other people.

There was hot chocolate, coffee, and graham crackers in the waiting room. I had no appetite but I forced myself to eat and drink. Rich and I ate lunch in the cafeteria. I don’t remember what I ate…….

And finally she was out of the OR. As we left to speak to the doctor one of the dads said “But who is going to answer the phone for us now?” And we laughed.

Sarah didn’t have three large kidney stones, she had about 10 smaller ones. It took the doctor several hours to remove them. They were so soft that they broke into pieces as she tried to get them out.

They did another test to see if her kidney had any abnormal areas but it was a perfectly normal kidney. We are all mystified about how she ended up with so much stone burden.

Then it was time to see Sarah and I could not wait. The nurse had me get right in bed with her. She was white and groggy, and a little weepy.

We put a cool washcloth on her forehead and helped her eat a bite of slushy which she promptly threw back up. She played a little bit on an iPad with shaky hands. After a while, the entire bed with both of us on it was wheeled down the hall, up the elevator, and into her room where she would end up spending three nights in.

I was so happy that night, the burden of anxiety of several months in anticipating this surgery was gone. I took this picture at 1 in the morning, when Sarah was wide awake watching The Poler Express.

She spent most of the day on Thursday in bed. She was in pain and had a lot of trouble getting to the bathroom. She didn’t want to move and she had no appetite. She was on an IV for fluids, antibiotics, and pain medication. That night she ran a temperature of 103. She was coughing. The euphoria of having the surgery over began to wear off a little.

By the next morning, Friday, we were both emotional messes. Rich had gone home the night before and went to work that day. I was so worried about the fever and just the whole experience in general and plus no sleep……it was so hard to stay cheerful. It broke my heart when Sarah was crying and she said, “Mama, why are you crying?” I felt like my emotions were making her feel worse.

The nurse was so wonderful. She talked to me and said that Sarah needed to get out of bed and that we would both feel better if we got out of the four walls of that room and away from bed and the idea of “sickness”. I hadn’t even thought of that because with Sarah’s pain I didn’t want her to do anything but rest…..which is not what the doctor and nurses wanted their patient doing….I stepped away for a few minutes to clear my head and compose myself. I went down to the cafeteria and ate breakfast (it was after 1o) and I sat and quietly cried as I ate. I made some coffee and took it back upstairs and found a young lady with Sarah, talking to her cheerfully. She was going to wheel Sarah down to Radiology so she could have an X-ray on her abdomen to make sure the stent was in place.

(As she was spiking a fever, she had to have several extra tests to see if she had infection; a urine test, blood test, chest X-ray, and abdomen X-ray)

She pushed Sarah in a wheelchair as I walked along not able to talk because I was still holding back tears and felt so worn out.

After the X-ray, the young lady (I cannot remember her name) took us to see the Family Resource room and that is where Sarah and I both began to cheer up and believe once again that life was worth living. 🙂

There was so much to do in the room, it was clean and bright and very kid-friendly. There was an iPod table, books, computers, and a big beautiful fish tank. Sarah got out of the wheelchair and walked around (slowly, and sort of bent over because her tummy was sore).

She perked up and began chattering just like the Sarah we know and love.

We went back to the room so she could get her next dose of medicine and Rich surprised us by walking into the room….he spent the whole rest of the day with us.

The two of us took Sarah to the cafeteria to eat lunch. She ate a whole taco and it was an absolute joy to watch her eat and say yum over her food again.

And then she did more playing!

That afternoon she also went to an art time on a different floor–her Dad took her while I went for a little walk and then colored in the 6th floor waiting room as an older lady slept in a chair next to me.

And then! Oh joy, I was able to go home to sleep that night and Rich stayed with Sarah.

I went back early on Saturday morning….I was there by 6:30. Rich had to leave to coach wrestling. Sarah had spiked another fever and at first there was talk of having her stay another night.

In the meantime, we had to leave the room again to keep our spirits up. Sarah didn’t go in a wheelchair this time, she walked on her own two feet. The nurse disconnected her from the IV and it was nice to go along without having to push around an iv pole. She insisted on pushing all the buttons for me.

Her poor hair was a rat’s nest. I hadn’t combed it because she was so grumpy in the days after surgery that I knew that she wouldn’t tolerate me messing around with her hair. But as soon as we got back to the family resource room and she was playing on the computer, I sat behind her and oh so very gently combed her hair until it was finally smooth again. It took a long time.

She strung a few beads and then got too tired.

She played with puzzles.

And the giant iPad. We were the only ones in the room.

We went back to our room to rest and the nurse came to take out her “tubes”. She asked if we were ready to leave and go home and we both smiled and said yes, we were. So discharge was underway and as soon as he could, Rich drove back to the hospital to get us.

Goodbye, fish

We left with the knowledge that she would probably spike another fever that night, but we had prescriptions to fill and a phone number to call with any questions. The tests they had done to double check on infection all came back clear…urine, blood, lungs, tummy. The doctor ended up deciding that the fevers were probably from surgery itself, and bacteria going into her system from the stones being disturbed.

The sisters were reunited, we ate ice cream on the way home.

The brothers were happy to have Sarah home again. Caleb had spent some of his own Christmas money on a few little gifts for Sarah and before I knew it, she had gone all the way up the stairs to play in her room with her devoted brother.

She slept in our room that night and although she did wake up upset and confused, she didn’t spike a fever after all.

She had a sponge bath on Sunday morning and it was so good for her to get the hospital smell off and her hair washed good and clean again.

I braided her hair and when I left the room to get something, she turned to her dad and said, “I look pretty…don’t I?” Yes, you do, Sarah.

I took this picture last night when Rich and I were reading in bed.

Today has been good…she’s still moving slow but the pain is getting easier for her to deal with. I left her for an hour with Grace as I went to the store to get milk. I’ve been busy making muffins, cleaning, making tacos for lunch, more cleaning, catching up on so much laundry, all with a peace in my heart that Sarah is okay and getting better again.

She has an appointment tomorrow with urology and the surgeon as a follow up. I know she’s healing nicely but of course I want to know what the urologist says about what we can do for her to hopefully prevent her from getting kidney stones like this again.

Thank you for your prayers!

wrestling photos

Posted on January 11, 2016 by Shanda

I went to Ethan’s wrestling tournament on Saturday and I was too late to watch his first match in which he lost…..I arrived just in time to see this bleak scene. I was able to sit by Ethan and try to cheer him up by saying things like, “Do you want a drink? Do you want a banana?” “I’m going to sit right here and not leave your side, E.” “Do you want me to rub your sore shoulder?” Although he didn’t want anything, I did finally get a few smiles out of him.

I am of the opinion that, even as a mere spectator, wrestling is extremely draining! To anticipate the matches and then watch my own boy plus the other boys (which are also “my” boys) wrestle….to see them fight so very hard, get hurt, bleed, lose, win. It’s all quite exciting. I hate it in some ways. The gym is a bee hive of activity and so very loud, for instance. But it’s also a lot of fun and I’m always always impressed by the strength of every wrestler.

Rich has someone tape each match and I noticed that Gage is always quite eager to watch himself right after he’s done with a match. One of my wrestling mama-buddies is Nicole in the striped shirt (her son behind her is a great friend of Jacob and Ethan).

Sarah runs as wild as possible, plays with Seth and James (the other coach’s little boy) and this Saturday she had a silly situation with static charged hair.

Grace is a team manager and keeps score with the book.

Seth took his shoes off so he could get on the wrestling mats as much as he could, got scolded for it several times, but he is like everyone’s little brother and they love him. I took this picture because he was actually standing still, watching a boy get his ankle examined by a trainer. He would silently look at what the trainer was doing and then look at the face of the boy. The only thing that scared me was that he might have gotten it into his head to think an injury would be really cool…like, it’s a sign of being a big-time athlete.

Well, E had two forfeits to wait through and then low and behold, he was up against the very same guy who beat him badly the first match. But this time Ethan came very close to winning.

He fought so so hard. As usual, I felt as if I were fighting along with him. Oh how painful it is to have them lose by only one point! But his dad was thrilled to see him come back and fight hard.

After the match discussion.

Well, the next day was Seth’s turn. Finally he could be on the mats all the time he wanted. His first match was a loss and he got dumped on his head a few times. It was quite deflating for our boy Seth. But after resting on Dad for a little while, he very bravely wrestled three more times and won each time, receiving a 2nd place medal.

Seth working on pinning a boy.

Caleb wrestled three times and lost each one…however, he was braver by the last match and was much improved.

David wrestled twice and lost both, however he still received a third place medal because there were only four boys in his bracket. He wrestled much better than he did last year and was exciting to watch.

David smiling because he’s getting away from Mom’s camera.

******

My three younger boys only have one more tournament to be in but Ethan will have several more opportunities to wrestle before the High School season is over.

for a 60th

Posted on January 7, 2016 by Shanda

I decided to blog while I’m waiting for Sarah to have her procedure…… in six days. Isn’t it so weird when you have to continue on with life even when things are happening that make you want to *sit and wait it out* instead of proceed with the days as usual? How weird to make dinner while thinking about packing a hospital bag? Or cheer for a wrestling meet while knowing in one week your child will be put to sleep for surgery? I have had this sensation many times (for other reasons) and will no doubt have it many times to come. It’s anticipation in it’s lower form— A not nice “anticipation” for a dreaded event to come and most importantly, GO. But thank goodness for work and keeping busy to take our minds off things!

*****

This morning we allowed dear Ethan to sleep in because he’s been working very hard at keeping in top shape for wrestling but has had a bad cold for several days. I took him to school at 9:30 and then parked the car so I could walk up the hill and back. 2 miles in the cold sunny air. I found myself getting almost chipper as my legs stepped along at a quick pace. I thought about how many times when I was a child I would run off into the woods to cry things out. Without knowing it in so many thoughts or words, my soul knew that I would come to peace out under the trees, curled up in a ball on soft green moss. These thoughts quickly proceeded into thoughts of Heaven and how wonderfully pure and sweet each emotion will be when that time comes, how good food will taste, how comfortable our bodies will move, and how wonderful it will be to spend eternity with Jesus and family……..I spent the whole walk thinking of the ways I thought Heaven might be…..sparing a few thoughts of gratitude for the tissue in my pocket.

Do you know what DNR means? It means “Do Not Resuscitate”.

The main purpose of this post it to show the photos I took this past Saturday at my Dad’s 60th birthday party, at which he received two bracelets from Aunt Carol, who is a nurse (and pictured directly above this paragraph with the baby). The other one that she promptly put on Dad’s opposite arm proclaimed him to be a “fall risk”. So right away we are laughing.

I’ve known my dad for almost 40 years. It’s funny to think of it that way. But we obviously go way back.

I’m just realizing now that I don’t even have a picture of Dad and myself together from the party day.

My sister’s boy, my boy, and my brother’s boy. How can it be?

My brother Nathan and his wife Melissa with some goof-ball.

Abbie

I admired Nate’s facial hair.

Nate, you’re handsome.

Cousin Erika made Dad’s drum cake.

Grace, Abbie, and Maria (my sister in law)

One of the ways Aunt Mary keeps forever young is to spend as much time as possible with the children.

Erika’s baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all signed our names on a new volleyball for Dad to keep.

Uncle Brian (Aunt Carol’s husband) also gave Dad a suitable gift for old age:

I heard they were made out of York Peppermint Candies, which elicited even more humorous remarks……..

I put together a slideshow of photos for Dad…….

And then it was time for volleyball for those who wanted to play.

We are a talented group. Not to mention all the women are gorgeous.

And children well behaved, creative, and vibrant.

I love the hands in this photo, fussing with the baby.

Time for the song and the cake!

The many names of Dad.

L O V E

and more L O V E

I caught this adorable moment between cousins (only three months apart) Gregory and Seth, showing each other how to tie a shoe.

Emily and Jacob played checkers

Happy Birthday to my loving Dad. It was such fun spending the day with you and the rest of the family………

Here is our group picture!!!!!!!

Click on it to see it bigger!

Thank you to the church for letting us use the gym for the party and for everyone who helped out and made it a happy day.

Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present, and future. ~Gail Lumet Buckley

If you’re interested in seeing the slideshow, click here.

one week from today

Posted on January 6, 2016 by Shanda

I’ve been avoiding this topic but I write today to ask for your prayers because in one week from today Sarah will have surgery to remove kidney stones from her right kidney.

We found out she had them because she began having a urinary tract infection that came back after antibiotics. Our pediatrician sent us to a specialist and she had an ultrasound and a cat scan done which showed three stones. One is 2 cm, one is 1.5 cm and the other one is –I can’t remember–but smaller. The doctors are intrigued by her because these stones are larger than they typically see for a child her age (5 and a half).

Children can get kidney stones for a variety of reasons, including a poor diet (too much processed food, high in salt, and a lack of adequate water intake). Generally speaking, stones are quite common, which I didn’t know or care about until my own daughter made some. (sigh)

Like most people, I get nervous about medical situations. I was very upset when we learned that she needed surgery and that the doctors couldn’t tell us right away why she made the stones or what we can do to prevent this from happening again.

However, as I force myself to look on the bright side there are many many things to be thankful for:

She has had no pain. no pain!
modern medicine and specialist doctors means they can be removed and everything will be done in an up-to-date and professional way.
Although there is a chance she will need to have open surgery to remove the stones, at this point the plan is that it will be done robotically which means 4 tiny incisions and probably no stitches. They say she can probably go home the same day as the procedure.
Ultrasound and blood work was normal, and the infection at the time of the diagnosis was very minimal. She takes a preventative dose of antibiotics every day to keep the UTI away.
although she does have a slight amount of “grit” in her urine, her 24 hour urine test was also unremarkable (according to the doctor).
all the doctors have been calm and unconcerned about this, which settles my emotions because THEY are the experts….and I am the over-reacting mother.
in the grand scheme of things…..kidney stones?? not a big deal. She appears perfectly healthy, in fact, she’s brighter and happier than she’s ever been (she loves going to school) and she’s so smart!
She enjoyed her experience at the hospital and looks forward to going back. (so weird) LOL She especially loved the button that you could push to get a nurse to come and do things for you.

I don’t really want to talk about this, but I did want to let my friends know what was going on because it’s on my mind, and usually the fears that I put out into the light tend to lessen in the sharing.

Psalm 136:26 Give thanks to the God of heaven, for his steadfast love endures forever.

7 degree morning

Posted on January 5, 2016 by Shanda

After an unseasonably warm start to winter, the temperature dropped to five degrees last night.

As the children prepared for school, my thoughts went to the chickens and I knew their water would be frozen and I would soon be stepping outside to carry some down. Sometimes I dread it. Most times I send one of the kids. Today I couldn’t wait to go myself.

I put on a dark purple down coat, a neon orange stretch hat, gloves and boots. I was smiling. A New Englander through and through, I loved the sound of my quick stepping boots crunching and squeaking lightly over the frozen grass. My the tip of my nose was numb and my cheeks burned in the icy wind.

I thought about the essay I read by Rose Wilder Lane about her frustration that in her opinion, her mother Laura was a “slave to hens”.

Laura must have been smiling at times on her way to the coop, too. I poured hot water over the the feed, making a sort of “oatmeal”. She did the same, on a much grander scale. She loved caring for her flock and took pride in the fact that in their community, she was the only one who kept them producing eggs even in the dead of winter. They were happy, nurtured, cared for. One of the several definitions for the word “slave” is “a person who is strongly influenced and controlled by something.”

I suppose we are a slave (albeit willingly) when we serve someone or something in such a sacrificial way, from our God, our husbands and children, to our community, to our animals, our careers…….it’s not a bad thing. It’s beautiful, especially when it is done with love.

Do everything in love 1 Corinthians 16:14

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends John 15:13

Listen to my voice in the morning, Lord. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly. Psalm 5:3

With one hand holding my camera and the other holding my coat sleeve over my frozen nose, I took these pictures for you, this morning.

the story of a birthday, with recipes

Posted on January 4, 2016 by Shanda

On the morning of December 31, Jacob woke up and smiled. It was his nineteenth birthday and he was looking forward to being home all day long as the center of attention, with lots of family and friends saying Happy Birthday over and over, and generally making merriment in his honor. As the first of seven children, he always felt his very best in a crowd.

His sweet girlfriend was the first to arrive. The day was sunny and pretty.

Emily and Jacob spent time together until she had to go to work.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, I was very busy making meatballs out of 10 pounds of hamburger.

M E A T B A L L S

I have opinions about meatballs. The ones found in the frozen food section of the grocery store are miles away from being as tasty as homemade. The only ones I have found pre-made that I will pay good money for are a brand that costco sells in the refrigerator section. They are sold in bags of sauce and they are very good. But I haven’t been able to find them lately and also they are a bit more expensive than homemade.

I didn’t like making meatballs until I thought to myself, “I DO like making cookies and they are the same exact concept”. Big bowl, dump in ingredients, mix, and form into balls on cookie sheets. Bake at 350. EASY!

Here is a basic recipe, but the sky is the limit with meatballs. Simple is best.

4 pounds ground beef
2 eggs
4 slices fresh bread, town into bread crumbs
1/2 finely minced onion
1 1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp pepper
1 cup tomato juice

Mix together, form into balls, bake at 350 for about 30 minutes or until done.

At this point you may cool them and freeze for later, or use them in your favorite recipe.

For Jacob’s party I put them in a crock pot, poured sauce over and turned the dial to “warm”. I prepared buttered noodles and kept them in casserole dishes in the empty oven to store until dinner.

A note about sauce. I do buy prepared sauce and keep it in the pantry but lately I’ve been cutting the saltiness of it by adding a big (28 oz) can of plain whole tomatoes to the pot. To me this has a fresher taste and is more “tomatoey” rather than “processed spaghetti sauce”. A plain, simple, but high quality sauce is nice for simmering meatballs because the meatballs flavor the sauce deliciously.

The house began to fill with teenagers. Jacob is blessed to have great friends in his life and also a birthday that falls on a great party day—New Year’s Eve—and for the last few years the day has turned into an all night celebration for them (not me. I hate staying up late.)

With Ethan and a couple other boys on the wrestling team, we try to have lots of fresh fruit and veggies in the fridge at all times. And it’s good for all of us to eat them.

Caleb’s mom won the “best dip” award (no prize, just the title) by sending along a a couple bags of waffle fries for us to bake and then serve with this dip:

1 tub of sour cream
diced chives (a couple handfuls)
a pack of bacon cooked and diced
a cup of shredded cheddar cheese

Mix together and chill for at least an hour and then top with a little more chives and bacon. Serve with waffle fries.

amazing…so so good

Our old couch is now down in the basement along with a TV and the game systems. So this year it became the kid’s favorite hang out place. I just had to control my curiosity and not go down to see what they were doing constantly.

Just once in a while. And it’s always interesting. Who would have expected seeing Ethan with a tower of dog biscuits on his head?

This is the face of someone whose heart was saying all day long, “How can my darling baby boy be 19 years old?”

Rich is always trying to get kids to do sit ups and push ups with him.

TIME TO EAT! but first a birthday blessing……

directly followed by a little bit of wrestling

not sorry Tessa….you’re beautiful even with your tongue sticking out….

LOVE LOVE LOVE these SMILES!

Emily came back as soon as she was done with work. She couldn’t wait to dive into the meatballs because I had only let her have one of them that morning.

even more wrestling

They were watching a football game together. (Caleb is a huge football fan).

Eventually it was presents and cake time.

This was Seth about to almost put his dog in the flames. *sigh* thank goodness Emily was there to intercept. Blowing out the candles couldn’t happen fast enough, in my opinion. I think Parker the dog was nervous, too. He helps me keep things under control.

Moist Chocolate Cake

2 cups flour
2 cups sugar
3/4 cup baking cocoa
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1 cup canola oil
1 cup brewed coffee, room temperature
1 cup milk
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla

In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda, baking powder and salt. Add the oil, coffee and milk; beat at medium speed for 2 minutes. Add eggs and vanilla; beat 2 minutes longer.

Pour into a greased 9 by 13, or for a layer cake, two greased and floured 9 inch round baking pans. Bake at 325 for 25-30 minus or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely before frosting.

BUTTERCREAM FROSTING

1 cup butter, softened
8 cups confectioners sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
1/2 to 3/4 cup milk

Spread frosting between layers and over top and sides of completely cooled cake (note: this is plenty of frosting to top two 9 by thirteen cakes kept in the pans, which is what I did for the party).

(I doubled this recipe for two 9 by thirteens)

recipe source: taste of home baking classics cookbook

Thank you to Emily and Ethan and his girlfriend Tessa for serving out the cake and ice cream.

Jacob had a wonderful birthday and it was fun to see him enjoy himself. One of my favorite things about him is his ready laugh.

That’s frosting on those pants.

By the next morning, after a night of doing who knows what, the teens were all watching Sesame Street of all things. We ate breakfast prepared by Emily at about 8:30 and then people began to either 1) leave or 2) crash all over the couches to sleep.

Jacob had a lot of changes in the last year and we look forward to seeing him continue growing and learning throughout this next one, too. His last year of being a teenager.

Time flies. And we are having fun.

sweet family christmas

Posted on December 29, 2015 by Shanda

02 Away in a Manger

07 Joy to the World (feat. Jay Ungar)

The morning of Christmas Eve, I woke up at 5 and was unable to fall back to sleep. I slipped out of bed, put on my robe, and tiptoed out of the room to spend some quiet time in the house before the family woke up. I imagined a nice cup of coffee to be drunk in leisure while gazing at the Christmas tree all aglow.

However, when I opened the door I discovered a sleeping teenage boy on the couch, along with my six year old son Seth who was wide awake and watching Garfield on TV.

And he was full of energy. Nothing I tried would get him to stop moving from one activity to the next. I wondered if he had perhaps eaten sugar or candies for breakfast.

Therefore, it was quite surprising that the next day -Christmas Day- Seth was the last child to wake up!

We sat as the dark morning turned into light and waited for the youngest sleepy head brother to appear. And he finally did at 7:30 am.

He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. Roy Smith

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. ~Burton Hillis

I wonder if I’ll ever be as happy as I am right now with my own children to please with gifts, while they are all still mine, at home. They are a joy to watch as they open their presents. The smiles, the exclamations, the gratitude, all make the busy days leading up to Christmas worth every moment.

Jacob opened the much wanted PS4.

Jacob and Ethan don’t spend as much time together as they did when they were little boys, so it was a sweet sight to see them side by side, sharing another Christmas day.

Watching Seth’s face as he opened a gift. And Caleb as he read through the titles of some new books.

Grace sat in a nest in the corner of the couch and opened her new iPod.

This was the first year that we had a child buy presents for his family members out of his own paycheck! Jacob was very excited to shop, wrap, and give out gifts.

This was his face as he watched his Dad open new sneakers that he bought for him.

He gave David a Ninja star, with very sharp points.

He gave Grace throwing knives and she was thrilled and touched by his thoughtfulness.

He gave Ethan a pair of “sick” sneakers. (same kind that he and Emily wear).

Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen. ~Author unknown

Parker received a new toy and several bones.

“One of the most glorious messes in the world

is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day.

Don’t clean it up too quickly.” Andy Rooney

Once the gifts were opened, the playing began.

Lego sets

big cats

Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.

~Laura Ingalls Wilder

little cats

books/new robe

new clothes

fire in the fire place

headphones and iTunes giftcard

He bought this album.

(by the way I loved the cone shaped tree things that I found from Target for Christmas decorating…they are covered in cherries! (I collect cherry things.) )

The rabbit hopped around in the wrapping paper and nibbled on cardboard and the Christmas tree.

Gentleman Gray got wrestled by Seth.

And he was pinned!!

We put our “old” TV downstairs in the basement and set the kids up with their own entertainment area with the old sectional couch. The PS3 and PS4 are hooked up. For many years I resisted video games for the kids but over the last year (our first) the boys have enjoyed themselves so much with the games. They have friends over often and it will be nice to have the living room cleared up for our own use now.

(In fact, Michael and Jacob are currently at Savers trying to find a coffee table).

Seth got a real bow and arrow set and he couldn’t get over it. He was in awe. He came to me and wondered who had picked it out. “It was I”, I said. “Thank you, Mom” he replied, and my heart melted because it was probably his most sincere thank you in all his six years of living.

His Dad took him outdoors for his first lesson in bow shooting.

Sarah told me I should not have gotten it for him because it was real and “not a toy”. (you should only get toys for christmas, she thinks) But Seth wants it anyway.

My handsome firstborn son, Jacob, who is turning 19 in two days. Emily gave him a new jacket for Christmas and her Dad gave him the hat which is a very lightweight hat so he keeps having people hold it to admire how light it is.

Grace came out of the woods after throwing her new knives and shooting her bow.

We passed by each other as I was on my way to find David.

He was busy practicing with his new tomahawk in a world of browns and greens.

He made the target himself.

Isn’t it beautiful in the woods? He has already spent hours in this spot.

He’s amazing.

I stood and watched him for a while, and he took my picture.

This was as cozy as I could be for the day. I was sick with a cold…..so a long warm skirt was just the thing to wear (sort of blanket-like) and a new sweatshirt from my husband. Hair pulled back, bangs bobby pinned back out of my face. No make up. Cozy, cozy, cozy. I was even wearing my slippers. LOL (not pictured)

The last pictures I took on Christmas day were of the chickens enjoying their christmas gift from dear Emily….which was MEALWORMS. Yum, yum. They love mealworms.

And, so, Christmas comes to bless us!
Comes to teach us how to find
The joy of giving happiness
And the joy of being kind.
~Gertrude Tooley Buckingham

on the eve of Christmas day

Posted on December 28, 2015 by Shanda

Ah, sweet Christmas.

I will allow nothing to discourage me about the reality of saving grace in Jesus Christ. There is no condemnation for those who love Him. Condemnation happens when we or someone we hold in high esteem convince us that we are unworthy to be called a child of God because “we don’t dress right” “we don’t go to church often enough” “we drink a glass of wine now and then” “we listen to the wrong kinds of music”…..things that are NONE OF ANYONE’S BUSINESS…you see, as a lover of Christ I AM FREE. I am free to be the unique individual He made me to be. Salvation changes a hard, stone cold heart into a tender heart. Salvation means that Christ has made my soul properly clean before God, because of Him, I have a secure hope that when the time comes for Heaven, He will stand with me and advocate for my standing as a beloved daughter, a person chosen and precious before God. I am welcomed into everlasting life. Therefore I have new life, I have hope as I live my days here as a wife and mother, as a friend and a sister. By the amazing grace of God.

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death. Romans 8

I AM NOT FREE TO be habitually judgmental, jealous, bitter, mean, unkind, fake, cold, abusive, unforgiving, prideful, angry or selfish. People who call themselves christians and still continue year after year in these behaviors are scary. I will run away from them……..I’ve had experience with “christians” who are like this and I myself was somewhat legalistic years ago for a time because of the leaders in a former church’s example and teachings…..(I have a story—I understand if you have one, too) but God is ever faithful and grew me away from those behaviors which caused so many problems in my life. I still struggle at times because of that experience. So flee from any legalist people in your life. Don’t allow yourself to be tainted by their judgmental ways. Keep yourself childlike, trusting, open, loving, and gracious. Reading the Bible (God’s love letter to you) is the medicine our soul needs so that our hearts stay open and loving. “His law is love, and his gospel is peace.”

The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light. Romans 13:12

I will still make mistakes. AND IT’S OKAY BECAUSE I AM HUMAN, a beautiful humanly human. We all are. I love myself the way God made me, and the way he made my friends just the way they are, I don’t focus on their “faults”, I understand them and appreciate them. My friends love me the way I am. Are we perfect? No. But we are perfect for each other. (Good Will Hunting)

This is what I’m thinking about this Christmas season. …. Jesus Christ came from Heaven to earth to save sinners. AND HE DID IT, HE DOES IT. He ushered in an age of Amazing Grace. He swept away the doctrines of the Pharisee which held to an impossible standard of perfection and looked down on everyone else, and gathered up for his own the outcasts, the lowly, the lost causes, and turned them into children of God. He loves us so much. He always has, he always will.

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. James 1:17

******

We made the Christmas cookies. Every year there are two kinds that we simply must have: Russian teacakes and gingerbread men. My children helped me and they were very cute. (both the cookies and the kids)

Our neighbors came for a quick visit the morning of Christmas Eve and gave David a present (and the rest of us, too). One of the things I am most thankful for this last year is getting to know them better. We can visit and share laughs…and later on today we are going to see the new Star Wars movie together.

In the afternoon my sister and her family came. We had planned on a brunch but then found out that Jason had to work half day and Rich had to coach a wrestling practice. But we still had breakfast food….which we ate at lunch time.

We had pancakes, cinnamon rolls, hash brown casserole, cherry topping, whipped cream and maple syrup for the pancakes, mimosas, bacon, and sausage.

wonderfully active, silly boys

Michael came for brunch before he had to leave for work. This young man is like family to us, he is Jacob’s best friend and we all love him.

Naomi is my little niece and one of Sarah’s favorite friends. These two girls spent the day together playing.

They played with Naomi’s bitty baby, Grace’s old bitty baby, and Sarah’s bitty baby. 🙂

I thought it was so great that Naomi wore her Christmas dress to my house. She looked like a princess all day long.

Grace’s boyfriend Caleb was able to spend time with us as well.

In large family gatherings you just never know what will happen. David decided it was a good time to roller blade throughout the house.

We watched a movie (ELF).

And exchanged gifts…..so fun. I love my family…my one and only sister, her husband who is like a brother to me and Rich, their children. We are so thankful for each other.

Caleb videoed Grace opening one of her presents so his mom could watch it later on.

Determination and belief that there is room for him.

We played Pictionary. Amanda and I were a team, Jason and Rich were another team. At first they were winning……(we had to use make-shift game pieces)

But then we pulled ahead and won.

The losers didn’t want to be seen. 🙂

My beautiful niece Abigail with her cousin Ethan.

Then Jacob’s girlfriend Emily showed up bearing gifts.

She had a gift for everyone, even the chickens.

Jacob gave her a Willowtree figurine which she loved so much that she….

gave him a smooch.

aren’t they so cute???????

Jacob works at the shoe department in Dick’s sporting goods so she also got two pairs of sneakers.

And that was that. Everyone went home, we put the children to bed, and it was just Rich and I doing what we always do on Christmas Eve. Finish wrapping presents and arrange them all under the tree. I was getting sick with a terrible head cold that has lasted for days but we got the job done with a feeling of anticipation for the morning to come.

a cat, Ethan wrestling, Grace’s friend, & my books

Posted on December 22, 2015 by Shanda

We can’t keep kids or cats away from our beautiful Christmas tree! And it makes me smile.

Hello my friends. Rich and I are together today. We went downtown for breakfast and then to the mall to finish up our shopping. We are home now. He has his feet up on the coffee table and my feet are on his lap along with his laptop. And, I have my laptop, too. Parker is next to me licking his leg loudly and Gentleman Gray is curled up on a blanket at the end of the couch. It’s dark and pouring rain outside. Poor Caleb will not get snow for Christmas this year, I’m afraid.

Have I mentioned that Rich is the head coach for our school’s wrestling team? The first tournament was on Saturday and I got right up at the crack of dawn with him and rode with the team on the bus to the location, which was an hour away. Seth and Sarah came, too. Grace came along because she’s the team manager. It’s a family affair.

Here is a picture of Ethan after he won a match. The assistant coach is talking things over with him, his name is Jim. Little brother Seth is hanging around wanting to say “good job” to his big brother. ‘Cause that’s what you do.

Ethan is pretty intense so it’s nice when he cracks a slight smile.

handshake

Later on, Ethan got bloody and lost a match. There’s his Dad in the background, and Coach Jim is about to take his arm and lead him to the trainer to get cleaned up. Oh and there’s Seth again.

Here is a picture of Ethan right after he won another match. All in all, he did very well. He wants to do nothing but win, his heart is in the right place, but this time he lost 2 and won 2. Ethan is a senior this year and we have high hopes that he will continue to do well in wrestling, and then he will move on to baseball. Before we know it he will graduate, and I hate to say this but it looks like he’s heading for the service after graduation. I’m trying not to think about it but stay tuned because by God’s grace that blog post will eventually be written.

THESE TWO ARE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Grace and her suitor. I took their picture from clear across the gym because I can’t help myself.

*****

I hope your Christmas plans are all coming together. I have decorated the house. I have bought and wrapped the gifts. I have planned a Christmas Eve brunch. I have made cookies….but they have all been eaten so I plan on making more if I can gather up enough interest…I feel as though I don’t really need to eat anymore cookies. I’ve been reading books instead of baking. One of my favorite authors is Janice Holt Giles, who wrote books in the 1960’s. “Pre internet” fiction is my favorite, it seems less spoiled and more sincere. I read her book, Hannah Fowler years and years ago–many times, and finally got around to reading several more of her books which I picked up at library booksales. I finished Tara’s Healing yesterday and then started Savanna. I would be interested in knowing if there are anymore Giles fans out there!

David’s bus will arrive in half an hour so I have just enough time to read a few more chapters before the late afternoon rush of children/homework/wrestling practice/dinner begins.

You are loved. ~Shanda

If you’re alone, I’ll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I’ll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I’ll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I’ll just be me. ~Author Unknown

ink everywhere

Posted on December 18, 2015 by Shanda

I came out of my room this morning, wrapping myself up in my soft red robe. It was 6:20 and the schoolbus would be arriving within the next 15 minutes or so. I found Grace on the couch, finishing up her homework with her Madrigal dress next to her ready to take to school for a performance. “Did you eat anything yet?” I asked. “No.” I handed her an apple. Ethan needed me to write a check for a school skiing trip and I gave David a kiss on the cheek as he ate the rest of his breakfast. Very soon this peaceful moment would be over.

David recently found the TV series, “Top Shot” on Netflix and has been watching it every chance he gets. It has inspired him. In case you haven’t seen it, it’s a competition type show with a group of people trying to be “top shot”…they spend all their time shooting guns and arrows at targets. In every episode, someone has to leave the show so that eventually there is only ONE winner…..the TOP SHOT.

David won’t be watching it today.

David will be having a talk with Mom and Dad.

The upstairs was out of toilet paper. Sarah needed some. The bus still hadn’t arrived for the teenagers. After helping Sarah I went back downstairs just in time to find THICK, DARK BLUE, BALL POINT PEN INK shoot out of David’s hand. It could have been much much worse. He can thank his lucky stars that it miraculously DID NOT go on the leather couch or the rug. Instead, it was dribbled all over the floor and the kitchen island.

Acting quickly, while screeching, I grabbed paper towels. Those of you with experience will know that ink isn’t the most pleasant of liquids to clean up. Raw egg is bad…..ink is far worse. At first wipe, the ink drop will turn into a horrifying ink smear. Turning the paper towel to a white side and wiping yet again, it will then turn it into a lighter blue smear. And thus the action is repeated, to be finished up with a shake of BAR KEEPERS FRIEND, and a prayer offered up in gratitude that THAT ink drop came off the wooden floor/island. Then, off to clean up the next one.

My finger tips are still currently stained a pale, deathly blue.

“All that pen wanted was to be turned into a book.” said Grace, looking on from the door.

“If only David felt the same way.” I replied.

So, how did this happen? After many confusing moments and much questioning, I finally figured it out.

He’s been modifying pens.

To do this, he must take a perfectly good ball point pen and take it all apart, causing it to never more be useful as a pen. But wait! It will soon be even BETTER than a pen! For then, he wraps a rubber band with duck tape around the pen. It is now a shooting device.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm, What to shoot? THE INK CARTRIDGE that used to be inside the pen, of course! After all, it is thin and has a sharp point on the end, just like an ARROW!!!! Genius.

What David learned today was that the ink cartridge MAY explode as you shoot it!

“I’ll have to put glue on the end next time” I heard him say to himself as he helped clean up the ink.

“David I do not want you ruining any more of our pens!”

The bus came. The bus went. Goodbye E, Goodbye Grace, Goodbye David. Deep breath. Now it was time to get the elementary kids ready for THEIR bus.

I went downstairs to wake up the boys, amazed that they slept though the excitement. Seth did say he had heard me say something. “What did I say?” I asked expectantly. “You said, ‘I’m so sorry I did that.'” “THAT. is NOT what I said,” I replied. (and David didn’t say it, either) He must have been dreaming.

The “TOP SHOT” story isn’t over yet….because guess what I discovered downstairs? Uh oh.

Not wanting to jump to rash conclusions, I ran to my phone to text Ethan. “Ask David if he took a ceiling tile and turned it into a target.”

(after a minute or two)

“Yes. He did.”

“I don’t think we should let him watch Top Shot anymore.”

I also found the workings of a modified Nerf gun in progress on his dresser. The baggie to the left of the gun is filled with parts that used to be INSIDE the gun.

This is what the inside of our kitchen trash currently looks like.

My child is a creative, busy, bright, single minded, scientist-type and I’m forever being impressed, delighted, and amused over his endless projects and interests.

But he still has to learn his limits.