Today was a good day.  I didn’t cry a bit.  I felt tired but good.  As of today, Rich is officially back to work, and I was surprised how fast the hours flew by. 

I admit I am not sure how I’m going to do all this next week, along with three more children AND homeschooling, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.

Seth’s skin is peeling a little bit.  Davy doesn’t like Seth’s cord and wants me to pull it off.  (made me laugh)  I told him, “I can’t PULL if off, it will fall off by itself and leave a belly button like yours.”

Seth is a very bright and content baby….and hardly cries at all. 

I hold him every chance I get.  How can I stay away from a face this cute?

Rich is out on the couch with Seth and it’s time to watch our favorite program on TV….the Andy Griffeth Show. 

Just wanted to stop by quick and tell you I had a good day.

((HUGS)) ~Shanda

Last week at this time I was in the hospital.  I went in at about 5pm, having very early labor pains.  My doctor was quite insistent about me getting to the hospital sooner rather than later so I wasn’t very far along when I got there.

The I.V. was placed, I was hooked to monitors and then we waited.  After a while, Rich and I walked the halls with the I.V. pole.  I was the only woman giving birth that night (and I remained the only woman there the whole time).  So I had the undivided attention of the nurses. 

After a while, as we walked and walked, the labor got more painful, and I did decide to have an epidural. 

The  anesthesiologist came with the medicine, and before I knew it, I was all tucked in bed at 8:30pm, relieved that the epidural was in place and that I could rest.  My doctor came in at that moment to see me, said I was at 5cms and broke my water.  Then she and the nurse cheerfully left and Rich cheerfully settled in the corner with a book.  I closed my eyes to rest…….all was quiet and calm.

Oh my goodness, the next contraction was terrible!  Only about 10 minutes had gone by and I frantically called the nurse with the handy little button on my bed.  She came in and patiently told me that “blah, blah, blah, the doctor said it would be impossible for you to be ready to push already, blah, blah”  (something was said about the epidural, can’t remember what).  Out she went again, on her merry way.

The next contraction came and I felt like I was being torn asunder!  I frantically paged the nurse again as Rich got up and quickly came to my side.  The nurse and doctor came together, running, and sure enough…..in just 20 minutes it was time to deliver a baby……

And what a painful experience it was! 

A couple things make me laugh now, when I think about them.

The first was The Washcloth.  My thoughtful doctor asked for a cool washcloth to be placed on my forehead.  I kid you not…..I remember it being placed on my head and then I remember no more.  I wonder if I threw it?  I asked Rich but he doesn’t remember either.

The other was The White Socks.  As I was in the clutches of merciless pain, my thoughtful doctor and nurse both kept asking me if I wanted my nice white socks removed…….I couldn’t answer at first, but I finally yelled

“I don’t care about the socks!”

Truthfully, the whole delivery did not take THAT long.  He was born at 9:20…..but it was the longest and most painful delivery of all of my children.  My sixth little wonder came down with his head a tad crooked, giving me the agonizing experience I never wanted.  I was in so much pain that I cried for help and accepted the offer to have him suctioned out.  So, my dear baby boy was born with not only a cone shaped head but also a bruise in the shape of a circle.

Thankfully I can report that his head is perfectly round now, and the bruise is gone.

Another thing makes me laugh.  When it was all over and I was shivering uncontrollably under heavy blankets my doctor came to my side and said,

“Oh Shanda!  I’m SO SORRY the epidural didn’t work for you!”

What can a woman say to that?  Honestly?  I just had to laugh.

They left Seth right on me and I got to keep him and hold him for a little while after he was born, as long as I wanted.  I felt no great emotion at his birth, just “um um um” (yes, that’s exactly how I felt)……..sort of shocked, I guess.  Like, “What in the world just happened here?”  As I perked up I got more and more happy.  Of course I counted his hands, feet, fingers, toes, and I did notice that he was crying sort of lamb-like…..”whimper whimper whimper” and then “bAAAAAAAA!”  So cute.

Then Rich held him.  Rich was some what traumatized by the birth, and I think even a little scared because he knew that all my other deliveries were almost effortless…..so, he felt that something wasn’t quite right this time, and was very relieved to have it all over and done with.

After Rich held him, the nurse weighed him and gave Seth his first bath right there in the room, with him in the baby bed under the warmer.  Rich took pictures as I shivered in the bed watching.

Oh my goodness!  I’ll never forget the sight!  His little feet waving at me, up and down!  I couldn’t see anything but the cutest dearest little feet!  That was when I asked Rich for the camera and I took my very first photo of my new baby boy Seth.

Come on now, does this not make you smile? 

And now, I just want to thank you again….so very very much….for praying for us.  

Thank you also, for praying for me specifically yesterday, regarding my anxious emotions.  I tell you the truth, I FELT THOSE PRAYERS all day yesterday, and smiled and trusted God and thought to myself every time I read through my comments and received the Scriptures and encouragement from you all — that surely God would answer the prayers of so many lovely people.  THANK YOU.

Today, I admit, was a rough day for me.  I didn’t get much sleep last night, but I did sleep.  The #1 sign for me, with the PPD, was sleeplessness.  With depression I CAN NOT SLEEP ONE WINK.  So, it is a relief for me if I fall asleep for even 3 hours, which was the longest solid stretch I got last night.

Rich went to work for half the day today and then he was home working for the rest of the day.

He is now warming up one of the many frozen meals that our dear church family have provided for us.

He is also trying to keep Seth awake for a little while.  He has been so sleepy all afternoon. 

Jacob, Ethan, and Caleb are in NY with their Grandparents.  Grace and David remain with us, and it’s been nice to focus on just three children, rather than SIX.  SIX!!!!!!!!

I’m getting used to that number now…….. well, I’m trying anyway.  I think about six children and I laugh!  Can I tell you something?  In my Senior year of H.S. it was predicted in the year book that Rich and I would eventually get married, live in the South, in a house with a white picket fence…and that we would have six children.  We don’t live in the South, we don’t have the white picket fence, but we have the best prediction of all……half a dozen offspring! 

So little Seth is a week old today.  I thank God for bringing us safely through the first seven days in such a tender and gentle way.  There have been ups and downs, but Seth is pure pleasure to take care of, and I am enjoying his newborn sweetness so much. 

Here are some photos of him that I took this morning:

“He truly is a miracle from God.  Only God could form those fi
ngers, and the perfect little nose, and that beating heart.”  ~from a letter that I received from a dear friend today, which made me cry as I read it. . . . . .

Love, Shan

Yesterday was a rough day for me emotionally….lots of tears…panic…anxiety…upset.  (deep sigh)  

I had post partum depression after three of my babies (Ethan, Grace, and David) and so now that is an ever-present thought in the back of my mind.  If I have a crying spell (like yesterday), I fear that I am going through depression again (even though I know the crying is normal for a new mommy).  So please just cover me with prayer right now, that God will settle my fears and fill me with His peace and warm love.  And that I won’t get depressed!

Baby is doing great.  He slept last night from 8:30 to 1:30, a five hour stretch!  I wish I could say that I slept as peacefully.  I was awake almost every hour wondering if I should wake him up and feed him. 

Rich has been a solid rock for me and really came through last night, taking charge of me and telling me what to do (I need him to do that, because I get so wishy washy and indecisive).  He made up the bed at about 7:30, put some music on in my room, and sat by me, holding my hand, and listened to all my thoughts and feelings.  It was comforting, to have that feeling of understanding between us.

I know that after having a baby there are a lot of emotional ups and downs, right?  It would comfort me to know that I’m not the only one giggling over a cute newborn one minute and overwhelmed with anxious thoughts the next.

(deep sigh again)

Ummmm.  Oh yes.  Listen to this!  Rich’s mom is coming today to pick up three of the children to spend the entire week with her.  I was too afraid of being alone to let them all go (she wanted them all)…so Rich decided that Grace and David would stay home with me and that Jacob, Ethan, and Caleb should go to NY and spend time with their grandparents. 

Also, David is sick and on antibiotics for an ear infection.  Caleb was checked during the same appointment and he had strep throat.  They’ve been on meds for over 24 hours now but the fact that they were/are sick added to my worries.  Ethan has a bad cold and Jacob is also looking run down and getting over a cold, too.

I’ve been asking Rich to fly me to sunny Florida.  (obviously, it’s just a dream)  We need some sunshine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Right now the children are all watching Tom and Jerry on TV.  Rich just left to get some things at the pharmacy downtown and Seth is sleeping.  It’s a mild day, weather-wise, and I ask you to pray that it will be a mild day for my emotions, too.  Thanks a bunch.

Love, Shan

Pictures……….

Seth’s first full day home

Seth in his new swing, which I love, the cover is as soft as a cloud

Seth on the quilt that Hannah made and sent to him.  It is beautiful!

Rich brought home the Toyota yesterday afternoon….and asked me to go for a short drive with the family.

Our six precious passangers (Caleb was sound asleep and slumped over)

In an attempt to cheer myself up yesterday, I went for a short walk…..it was so nice to see the woods again.

I can hardly believe it’s Friday!  Rich just left with the children (Jacob, Ethan, Grace, and Caleb) to go take care of business involving our new vehicle purchase….now that baby is here Rich is buying me a new Toyota Sequoia.  Since they don’t make it in any shade of green (my first choice) I picked red instead.  It seats eight, and that’s all that matters to me. 

David is in school…..so I’m home with baby Seth, who is sound-sound asleep in his little bed.

Things are going well….amazingly well.  For me, the biggest challenges to overcome after a birth are the mental ones….feelings of anxiety and loss of “control” as we adjust to a newborn’s needs.  Seth’s first night home was a little uncertain/anxious for me because we couldn’t get him to settle down until 1:00am.  He was very “snorty” and it was bothering him not be able to breath out his nose the way he needed to.  The dry air, I guess.  We all did end up getting some sleep and yesterday (our first full day at home) was a good day.  I don’t remember much of it at this time, though.

Last night was much better for Seth, he isn’t snorting anymore and he slept so peacefully.  We were in bed by 9, he woke up to eat at 11 and then at 3:45.  Then up again at 7 something.  And each time he woke up, he was only awake long enough to fill his tank and then back to sleep he went.  And he’s sleeping now, too. 

He’s so dreamy.  So tiny.  Rich and I adore him…looking at him, holding him, talking about how sweet he is to each other.

I thought you might like to see pictures of the children holding Seth for the first time.

Grace held him first.  My sister Amanda and her husband watched the kids for us while I was in the hospital and I was so happy that she made sure Grace looked pretty when she came for a visit (she even had polished nails!).  I felt so happy looking at my little red and brown bird/Grace. 

Grace enjoyed holding Seth, and made me laugh when she said, after just a few minutes, that he was heavier than he looked.  (I guess her little arm got tired out!)

The nurses LOVED Grace, just loved her. 

And then big brother Ethan got a chance to meet Seth.

Here is another picture of Ethan with Seth.  David was hovering about, and I love the look on his face in this picture.  And Ethan looks so loving.  Papa is making sure Seth is safe.

Jacob couldn’t go to the hospital because he was home sick with a cold.  So, he held Seth when we got home.  Jacob isn’t bashful at all about baby, and talks to him all the time.  He wrote a note for Seth, too.  This is what it said, “Welcome Seth.  Grow up healthy and strong, And may you like Thomas the Tank Engine as your brothers did before you.  And may you like guns.”

And here is a picture of Davy-do with Seth.  One of my most special memories will be of David, when I was pregnant with Seth, asking me so sweetly, “How’s Seth doing?”  At least once a day he needed to know.

And, now that Seth is born he is still asking me……..”How’s Seth doing?”

Caleb said, “I don’t want to hold Seth!”  But, once we got Seth in his arms his eyes lit right up so happy.

The first thing Caleb said when he saw Seth was, “I’m BIG NOW!”  It was so precious.

Sitting here, remembering and writing about the past few days, I’m realizing again how quickly the time goes by.  This is such a sweet, sweet time….I’m starting to cry because I want them to last forever right now……I’m so thankful to God for Seth…… and I want to hold on to every moment with him and his brothers and sister.

The house is quiet, there is a fire going in the living room.  I think I’ll scoop my sleeping little one out of bed and go cozy up on the couch for a while. 

Love, your ol’ pal, ~Shanda

Thanks so much for all your heart warming congratulations!  Things are going well and I am enjoying the bliss of admiring and taking care of my very own newborn baby.  Rich will be home with me for the rest of the week and is doing a great job taking care of everything so I can rest as much as I need to.  The children are attentive to Seth and love to observe all the little things (“His eyes are open!”) that seem so miraculous and special in these early days.

Rich and I live too far away for most of our family to visit easily, so this blog is a wonderful way for our long distance family members (Seth’s grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins) to actually SEE Seth while he’s still little, and just two days after his birth.  All of these pictures, in fact, were taken today (except the first two).  Instant communication is amazing!

I’m continually amazed, and humbled, by all of my friends around the world who I have met through my blog.  You have embraced me and my family, and have not only prayed for us, but treated us with such warm and kind words of love.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Seth truly is a blessing from above, and I marvel……absolutely marvel, at this new son of mine.

Papa won’t even try to post an entry as well as Mama can, but she asked me to post a picture for you all…

Seth William – born Feb 2nd 2009 at 9:20pm.

6 pounds, 9 ounces and 19 inches long.

Mama and baby are both doing very well!

Papa won’t even try to post an entry as well as Mama can, but she asked me to post a picture for you all…

Seth William – born Feb 2nd 2009 at 9:20pm.

6 pounds, 9 ounces and 19 inches long.

Mama and baby are both doing very well!

After my doctor’s appointment yesterday I went to Target and got some odds and ends for baby….pacifiers and yummy Burt’s Baby Bee soap and lotion, and the little blue booties (which were only 75 cents). 

After Target, and a stop in to visit my sister, I went to Barnes and Noble and treated myself to lunch–soup and half a sandwich–which I ate while browsing through the pages of a book that I ended up buying because I liked it so much. 

It’s so inspiring….I’m not going to try to do a book review, but I encourage you to try to find it for yourself, and take a peek. 

I will share my favorite page, however…….from a section in which the author is describing her fondness for older domestic paintings, paintings of everyday life from years gone by.

I LOVE THIS PAINTING!

It is titled “A Life Well Spent”, by James West Cope (1878).  It pictures a mother, knitting with a book on her knees, her two young children standing in front of her, and her daughter sitting on the floor, reading a book and rocking the baby’s cradle.  In describing the painting, the author of the book had a lot to say, including these quotes which I underlined in pencil:

“I believe that for some women this (the domestic life) has been and still is, indeed a life well spent.”

“This mother was doing something incredibly valuable and enjoyable.”

“I reckon that any mother who knits red-and-white-striped socks while listening to her son’s catechism must have hidden depths.”

I enjoyed the painting and thoughts so much because I can relate in such a personal way.  I’ve recently begun what I imagine will be a lifelong love of handiwork….the crochet projects will start out simple, with simple stitches until I feel comfortable enough to do more challenging work.  The small embroidery projects, join the already constant baking in the kitchen….all with various sized little ones about me.   It truly is a life well spent, and worth enjoying every ounce!

After taking the pictures and looking through the book this morning, AND working on my own crochet, I happened across an old letter from my Great Grandma (who has since passed away).  In it, she described to me the projects she herself was working on (at 90 years of age):

“I did an afghan that had 836 little squares in strips of 38 and 22 rows put together with white 3 times around each strip.”

“I am just finishing up another Granny square afghan 8 squares wide and ten long.  I’m putting the edging on it and then I’ll be finished.”

“My morning glory bush is beautiful, lots of blossoms.  My sister Beatrice took a picture of me by it but I don’t know how it turned out.”

Part of the reason why I’m so excited to get involved in sewing, crochet, gardening (the gentle arts of domesticity!) is because I feel a connection with the women in my family as I work.  All of them…mom, aunts, grandmothers, cousins, sister, all have done their part to inspire me ….. by their example of being brave enough to try new things and enjoying their projects.  Painting, drawing, candle making, soap making, canning, sewing, knitting, crocheting, baking, LOTS and LOTS of gardening, painting and decorating the rooms of the home, I’ve seen all of those things as I grew up in a large family.  And now I’m awakening to it for myself in a larger way, and truly seeing what a beautiful life we women can make for ourselves in our homes. 

And I can’t tell you how tickled I was to have Jacob, Ethan, AND Grace all crocheting with me today!  (Rich, however, doesn’t QUITE know what to think of his boys with crochet hooks, LOL).

Just a couple more random photos before I go:

Jacob took this picture for me.  A darling chickadee got in the “grapefruit swing” for a treat!  And, do you see the other bird in the upper right corner flailing, trying to get his balance on a flimsy weed?  Cute.

Also, I thought Grace and her Dad were so sweet together today.  They went for a walk, down to the ponds to see if our skating ice was ruined (it is)….Miss Grace took her bunny along (it’s on a harness).

Daddy and his girl.  It’s a pleasure to watch Rich interact with her, I’m so proud of him…and we are both proud of our Grace.

She’s quite famous for shutting her eyes during photo sessions.  So, I’ll just take this one as the realistic snapshot that it is.  Still cute.

Well, I’m going back to snuggle (under one of Great Grandma’s blankets!) on the couch and crochet for a little while before bed.  Thanks for stopping by for a visit to my blog.  I hope you all are having a wonderful weekend!

**I highly doubt I’ll have the baby before midnight, so it appears that I will have a little someone sharing my birth-month with me.  Another “Purple Amethyst” —only this one is the 2009 boy model. 

~Shanda

If you ever noticed the curser on my blog…..than you may have an idea that I just might have a thing for piggies.

And not just these sorts of  piggies, although I do love them, too.  These ones belong to Caleb. 

Yes, I do think pigs are cute.  I have a collection of unique pigs (not any ol’ pig will do)…a cast iron one from Sturbridge, a small carnival glass piggie bank, a white china pig with purple violets on it that I found at an antique store with my Aunt Colleen, and others.  My family (mainly my Aunt Colleen, Aunt Mary, and my Mom) see pigs and think of me.  (LOL)  This weekend, when we celebrated Christmas with my parents, my mom presented me with several more pigs, including the young Miss Piggie who is now sitting proudly amongst my fiestaware.  She has privileges because she matches the dishes so well….don’t you think she looks good?  Mom and I got right up after I opened her and put her in the cupboard.  She can stand guard and look cute.

Well….what else is new?  I’m happy to say that after a tiresome day yesterday God granted me a lovely night’s sleep last night.  Oh how I needed it….I still got up several times but I never had trouble getting back to sleep and my sleep was deep and restful.

Rich is home from work today.  For Christmas, he gave me a card with ten dates written in it that were for my own personal days off…all throughout the year.  Today is my first official day off.  He even brought me breakfast in bed.  He came in the bedroom with two eggs and two pieces of toast.  He said, “They aren’t the prettiest eggs in the world, but I know they’ll taste good.”  When he gave me the plate, I laughed so hard….because the eggs were fine but the TOAST was burnt!  It wasn’t too far gone, so I still ate everything.  And it was very good.

All of our trees in the view out my window are coated with ice and the sun is shining behind them, making them glitter and glow so beautifully.

The kids are watching the birds out the kitchen window….cardinal, blue jay, little chickadees, woodpecker, etc…we set up several feeders and they love watching the birds.  Yesterday I put peanut butter and birdseed in a grapefruit half and strung it up to one of the feeders.  I call it the “grapefruit swing”…I hope the birds are impressed as the children were.  David was so inspired that he spread a piece of bread with p.b. and birdseed and ran it out back to put on the ground under the feeders.  A bluejay is working at it right now, as a matter of fact.

I took this picture of the dripping ice yesterday—-I was out on the porch. 

Icicles are so pretty, aren’t they?  I found two little ones outside, dangling from an evergreen, and brought them in as gifts for David and Caleb and they breathlessly thanked me like it was the biggest treat in the world.  They ate them right up…..delicious!

My mom, for Christmas, also gave me a ball of 100% cotton yard and a crochet hook to get me started on a dish cloth.  I was working on it yesterday.  After I took the picture I added a lot more to it, and now it’s almost done.  Mary Jane’s Stitching Room is an inspiring book that I’ve kept out so I can look through it now and then.

During one of my “crash on the couch” moments yesterday, Jacob observed, “Mom!  It seems like you’re on the couch every chance you get these days!!”  To which Ethan quickly replied by saying in a shocked way, “That’s because she’s PREGNANT, Jacob!”  I just smiled and thought, “How nice not to even have to defend myself!”  And how nice that my boys are being educated about living with a pregnant woman, lol.

Yep.  The couch is a nice place to be these days….but, I must admit….I’m starting to dream of spring and walks in the woods again.  I really miss being in the woods.  The boys go out to walk the dog and I make them give me nature reports when they come back inside.  The other day Ethan brought me a tall tall thick weed to show me.  He liked it because it had a thin vine twirled around and around it.  It was decorated with vine.

This morning I have a doctor’s appointment (at 9:45).  I may try to go to the bookstore afterwards if I have the energy.  Rich, like I said, is taking care of house and children all day and I feel SO FREE!

Have you noticed my baby countdown?  Only 13 more days until my due date!  I’m getting soooooooooo excited.  Of course, the thought of labor and delivery doesn’t much excite me, but when it’s all over what a happy moment that will be!  I’ll have to teach Rich how to post Seth’s first picture to my blog so he can do that for me.  I wonder how many of you are checking my blog just to see if I’ve had him yet?    Such sweet xanga pals I have!  Thank you for your prayers and encouragement, it means so much to me! 

Love, ~Shanda~

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