I’m sitting on the couch in the livingroom, after reading through blog archives from 11 years back, searching for a photo of Caleb with his wooden Thomas trains.
School has begun again, and he is now a freshman in High School. He takes drum lessons, is in marching band and also playing football. He’s taller than I am, with light brown, wavy hair, blue eyes, strong arms and legs, and most likely wearing Hollister clothing (my boys’ favorite).
I was busily vacuuming the floors when they left for school this morning, when I stopped in my (train) tracks and turned off the vacuum.
Caleb recently turned 14, and for his birthday we bought him his most requested and beloved gift of dreams…….and it wasn’t a Thomas train like it was 11 years ago.
It was an electric drum set.
I took him to Guitar Center to pick it out. We were there for a very long time, because he wanted to try out every sound and every feature. He was in his own little world, sitting there and moving the wooden sticks, making beats, listening, enjoying himself.
A week ago, I found Sarah Joy prowling around in the storage room in the basement. She was looking for things forgotten about and the next thing I knew, the wooden crate of Thomas trains and tracks were back in the land of family again. They had been away for so long. I was charmed as I watched Seth and Sarah down on the floor, pushing them, setting up track, and making up stories.
Once upon a time, these same trains took naps with a smallest blond haired boy, he covered them in sugar, and paint, and golden glitter. He threw Devious Diesel into the pond, never to be seen again, because he didn’t like him. He parked his trains under the pancake griddle as I made breakfast. He let one roll down the auditorium (it was James) during his older siblings’ music concert, he carried them in his little paws, everywhere. He not only played with trains, he also watched the videos and read the books, he even had Thomas bedding and clothing.
Now he plays with drums. He carries drumsticks in his hands.
So, this morning I stopped in my (train tracks). The house was empty and quiet and the tracks had led me to Caleb’s drum set and a bunch of his old playmates parked underneath. Somehow, as I stood and considered, I imagined that the trains must have whispered to Caleb’s little brother and sister to put them close to where he would be.
Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17
This weekend Rich and I drove Grace and Brittnee back to college. Joanna was out of down and I was not expecting to see her, but on Saturday when Rich and I were eating lunch, all of a sudden there she was in the chair next to me, laughing. I was sincerely dumbfounded that someone (like me) who prided herself on extremely sharp mothering skills such as being able to detect ANY sneaky behavior, for example, could be taken by surprise by not only her husband but also her best friend, who were in league with one another to pull it off. I was impressed by them both.
Rich unreluctantly left us to go do his own thing while Joanna and I went to Starbucks and caught up with each other. I’ll never forget telling her things in tears and seeing her eyes so concerned and loving, even reaching out with her hand to brush a tear left behind on my cheek, like it was the most natural thing in the world, listening and caring with a heart of friendship. This is 23 years of relationship, no worries no anxieties, only sharing and leaning on one another through life.
Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom He gives. Colossians 3:16a
This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. John 15:22
Then, we got in her van and she barreled us into the countryside to see a field of sunflowers.
We took a photo of a pair of sunflowers to represent the two of us and our day.
I’m smiling as I look at these photos again.
And guess what?
When we left, we got to cut three sunflowers each and it began to rain so we did it quickly.
And then!! to my utter joy, a double rainbow appeared.
All day long, my heart was aching with the love and goodness of God.
Let me never forget, dear Father, open my eyes, remind me, remind me with rainbows, that everything good comes from above.
We spent half the day yesterday, cleaning our house here in Connecticut, yes, we are back home as of Saturday evening, and I felt that the house was…….. smelly. So I utilized the labor of my own self, and my children. The house is now lighter, cleaner, and fresher so this morning I was able to do other things……..namely, football related mom chores.
Caleb and Seth are signed up to play football again this fall. Caleb will be on the HS JV varsity team and Seth will be in youth. Seth needed cleats and I needed to drop off their physical forms at the doctors so the two of us had an outing this morning. I’m an early bird so we we were done with the doctor’s office with half an hour to spare before the sports store opened so……. Target, obviously.
Plastic bags are at a premium now, my friends! 10 cents a bag at Target, but if you take your own bag they give you 5 cents. I had no bags. My brain has to learn this new bag situation. I have plenty of reusable fabric bags but there are many ways to forget them at home or in the car, and so I do (forget them). I did manage to only have to buy 3 bags, however, but thirty cents is thirty cents!
We proceeded to the sporting goods store. This was what Seth was waiting for. The best cleats were “order only” so that was a let-down. Then, the hightops he tried to put on his feet were impossible to get on and I became antsy watching him pull and twist and loosen the laces to get them on his feet. “You are NOT going to want to struggle with those every day,” I said, firmly, and we moved on to different pairs. Poor thing had to settle for non-stand-out-basic-black cleats. How utterly “ho-hum”! Then we moved on to cups.
The key here is to, first of all, find the cups in the store (almost impossible), then, when presented with approximately 150 differents ones, find a cup which is comfortable for the boy, and the right size, along with the right size compression shorts that the cup has to slide into. The cups can be S, M, L , XL and the shorts are the same choices and to make things even more confusing, they are packaged in different ways; like, a small cup with a large short for example. So it takes a lot of careful searching. You can also buy JUST the cup, but you can’t (that I could see) buy JUST the short. But what if you buy a cup that’s too small or too big? How do I know what size shorts Seth is? The size was based on inches around the waist. I have no idea what inches Seth is around the waist. I had to take things out of packages and have him hold them to himself. I can’t imagine having a too-small or too-big cup “down there” and then having to run around playing football. By the time we got it figured out I had a fit of the giggles.
I mean, you can’t help but laugh sometimes. Years and years of buying these stupid cups for my five sons…….I’m beyond over it. Yet here I am, still buying the dang things. To me they are one of the ultimate embarrassing things that must be purchased in life. Cups. I don’t even want to mention them, they are an “unmentionable” to me, yet, every night on the way to practice now, I’ll be saying, “Did you put your cup on?” to Seth, just to make sure he’s got his protection. Do I care too little? Never. It’s always always TOO MUCH.
Then, somehow, after I said no 1,000 times to a fancy store-bought flavored mouth-guard, he ended up convincing me he needed a padded compression shirt. It will keep my baby safe so I agreed, then had to figure out what size he needed. “Just take your t-shirt off and try this on,” I said, giving him a boy’s medium. “Right here? in the store? What about a fitting room?” “No, it would take forever n’ever to find a person to unlock the door.” He had no arguement for that, so, off his t-shirt went, onto the floor (naturally) and……. on went the shirt. Well, it went on easily enough, but it wouldn’t come back off. After watching him make the most bizarre body contortions trying to get it off, I finally started taking a video.
I can’t stand the cuteness of this child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh he is SUCH a dear dear boy. You know, I hugged him in the store and he kinda got away from it and explained, “I don’t like arm pits touching me.” “Well, I was trying not to let it touch you, Seth,” I said, understandingly, in my sleeveless shirt. I tried to hold his hand and he threw it away. When I pushed the cart he held my arm and straightened my posture with his other arm, dramatically making sure I was walking properly and making me feel ancient. He kissed my arm as we walked, he put his hand on my shoulder, he allowed other hugs that didn’t include arm pits. He got on the side of the cart for a ride and made me groan because he’s so heavy now. He laughed at me and with me and for me. He sparkled his eyes at me. He put the stuff in the cart for me at Target and then in the car, and then he put the cart away, “no problem, mom”. He was jolly. My heart was happy to be with him. Of course once I told him so, he got goofy and I had to say, “now you’re just being annoying” but we can be honest with each other and he wasn’t at all offended.
After the sports store (where, once again, I couldn’t get a free plastic bag so I carried my purchases), we went to the bookstore so I could buy the New York Times. When we did our traveling recently I started getting into the habit of buying a newspaper to look at in the car and I greatly enjoyed reading it and clipping out the best gleanings I could find. You know you can find spiritual food in the newspaper, did you know that? It’s fun to look for it. For instance, the article about the terrible droughts in Zimbabwe included the quote, “We are seriously restricted from from living our lives, water is life.” and it immediately made me think of Living Water, God Himself, and how we can’t live without Jesus. So I clipped it out for my scrapbook and wrote the verse underneath.
“Anyone who is thirsty may come to me! Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’ ………” John 7:37
Well, guess what. No newspapers are sold in the bookstore any longer. No plastic bags, no newspaper. The plastic bags I can forgive, in fact, I say “good riddance”, but the newspaper???????????? I object to this, highly. So I comforted myself with a new book bag that says, “The World was hers for the Reading”, it’s a Kate Spade bag and I super-love it even though newspapers are no longer hers for the reading, at least the world is. I loved it so much I had Seth take my photo and the first one he took looked like this:
he had a hard time pushing the button so I went to help him just as he figured it out.
The second one looked like this:
What was in the bag, you ask?
It was a magazine for Seth all about fantasy football because he and his Dad are playing together this year and he wants their team to be good.
We went through the *chick fil a* drive-thru and ate chicken biscuit sandwiches on the way home and had a conversation that went on way too long for my liking about…..orange juice pulp.
Rich and I finally took the kids mini-golfing, they have been begging since we first arrived here. We hopped on our bikes and happily pedalled our way to the fascility. Seth was by my side as we rode along and he was full of questions, the most important one being, “Who do you think is going to win, Mom?”
I was full of answers, the most important one being, “Oh, I’m going to win for sure!”
So much for confidence, I not only didn’t win, but I came in DEAD LAST. This photo was taken right before Grace added our numbers and announced the placements. (which is why I’m still smiling).
***
After golfing we went to Zuzu’s on St. Simons and Rich said, “WHY did Sarah order a PANCAKE!”
I rather wish I had kept up with daily postings about our Jekyll experience. however, NO REGRETS!
We have gotten to the point where Seth and Sarah are able to go outside riding their bikes or catching lizards and we don’t worry about them. We have also gotten to the point where they have made a clinging friend, a little girl-friend, who walks right into the house like she’s my eighth child, asking where Grace is (first) and then Sarah. She’s currently on the couch with Sarah and they are watching you-tube (five minute crafts). She’s eating macaroni and cheese that she made herself, macaroni and cheese from our pantry, using our microwave. It’s too funny. It’s like she owns the place. She’s a tiny thing, and 8 years old.
This, our last Saturday, has been full of blessings thus far. Rich and I spent a leisurely extra hour or two in our room, reading, and then Sarah came in, too.
I was reading this book and was struck by a quote.
“The battle still rages but she is learning some of the ways and means for combating it.” pg. 264
So I went ahead and did a journal page.
for those days when the battle seems more violent than usual.
The sky and water from the upstairs porch ….. particularly lovely this morning.
We were sitting under an orange light……
Rich and I took the children back to Southern Soul BBQ (I had ribs, again) for a delicious lunch.
She never really felt that she had much in common with her Dad until I mentioned (just this morning) that she had the same color eyes as him. Now they are best friends. She looks right into his eyes, studying them, and proud.
I asked (begged) Rich to let Grace and I roam Brunswick while he ran errands with Seth and Sarah, and happily, he obliged. Grace and I were so so happy to be left that we sat right down on the side walk (behind the street sign) and recovered from too many hours of stimulation (in public and with Seth and Sarah). I read my “Tara” book and handed her my journal, which I have never shown her before, which is full of private thoughts. “I feel normal now,” she remarked when we got up to walk, handing it back to me.
The mix of *buds, freshly opened, and “past their prime” brown and withered* just struck my heart. “messy/beautiful” that’s life. All together, it really is lovely.
Grace can’t ever resist a good climbing tree.
It was a very easy tree to climb, she said. “It has very handy burrs,” I agreed.
We delighted in the brick pathways through the park.
Oh yes I plucked a rose.
“Rich, Rich! Pull over so I can take a photo!”
And he obliged, again.
PS, “last Saturday”……..”for now” is what we keep saying, to comfort ourselves.
“Blessed quietness, holy quietness, What assurance in my soul! On the stormy sea He speaks peace to me, How the billows cease to roll!” Manie Ferguson (hymn lyrics)
I’ve been in deep thought, and reading, so much here in our Jekyll home that it is all I can do to blog. But this morning I am determined to sit and type. Rich is upstairs on a call for work, Grace is reading in the kitchen, David and Caleb are still asleep, and the younger two are out visiting a sweet little friend they met at the pool. She’s here with her grandparents and they have a cat so….naturally they are fast friends.
What have I been in deep thought about? Mainly my spirituality, because all of life goes back to The Source of life, every problem or challenge is traced back to The Solution to the problems…..God in three persons, Blessed Trinity. The Triune God is a warm and heavy blanket over me when I am cold and lonely, and a cool refreshing breeze when I am fevered and emotional. My soul is saved by Him, my body and mind are calmed by Him and His Word. My Maker, my Redeemer, my Friend. Never my task-master, never cruel, never harsh, always kind, always ready with slow and gentle lessons to teach me the righteous way to live. I can trust Him completely.
During a harder day (emotionally) I went through my spiritual journal and wrote “I trust God completely” in every empty spot.
Each day I sit back (so to speak) and watch Him work.
That unexpected cheerful hello from a friend? That’s Him. That burst of cheerful energy when you were oh so weary and sad just an hour ago? That’s Him. The grace-filled love from a family member? That’s Him. The fact that your sandels didn’t get swept into the sea when you left them behind while you were out walking? That’s Him.
I love to credit God for every single solitary blessing big or small because of this verse:
“So, my very dear friends, don’t get thrown off course. Every desirable and beneficial gift comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light cascading down from the Father of Light.” James 1:17
And what of the not so wonderful moments? The dull ones? The aching ones? The terrible ones? Oh but they are a momentary thing! The weight of the world is constantly on our shoulders, we search with oftentimes great effort for the blessings, we feel deeply the pain of sin and death and “not-right-ness” because we live here in a cursed world as pilgrims, and wait in absolute assurance for The Day, that glorious new day, that bright morning when we open our eyes and see Him face to face.
There’s an element of the gospel within every timeless movie or book, not spelled out plainly, but spiritual truths hidden carefully like a precious jewel for us to search out. Gone With the Wind, to me, was a beautiful novel because although Scarlett did everything selfishly, she did it all for home, Tara. To her, home was the only thing worth working for, even at the cost of her own personal integrity and relationships.
Ah, home.
“I will lay my burdens down when I get home.”
“I just want to go home”
“I am home-sick for heaven.”
I explained these thoughts to my husband during a recent bike ride and couldn’t help but cry. He was concerned as to where the emotions were coming from…… “You have a home here, we have a wonderful home.” And I said, “Oh yes, yes, yes, we do, but I’m always (to varying degrees) homesick for heaven and the reason why I care so much about my home here with you and the children is because this home is a foretaste, a tiny imperfect appetizer, for what is to come.” and I hunger for it. What glory and security awaits in our true Home!
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We went out to eat at our favorite BBQ place on St. Simons.
We sat at the bar on tall stools and it was fun because we could watch all the nonstop action as food was coming out of the kitchen. The crew was like a well-oiled machine, from the greeter to the dish-washers. They have to be, in order to keep up with the many many customers.
The shelf up on the wall is filled with BBQ books of all kinds.
To my left. They don’t pass out napkins, they just have big rolls of paper towel everywhere and you need them!
Behind us was the entrance and views of outdoor seating. Smells of smoky BBQ filled the air.
To my right, past Rich, was a wall of merchandice for sale along with fun decor.
pig with wings
red and white patchwork pig was something I wanted to sneak in my purse (but didn’t bc of the Holy Spirit)
or, as Grace says, “my morals bit me”.
“On my Mind”
Once my food came I stopped looking around.
I had ribs (oh my word so so good) and two sides of collard greens. I LOVE. I could eat collard greens at every meal.
Rich had greens, turkey, and stew
Just the best.
Southern Soul Barbeque 2020 Demere Rd Saint Simons Island, GA 31522
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Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later. For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day. Romans 8:18, 19
…….I’m reading this amazing book (for the second time but it’s been 25 years)
AMAZING (I’m in awe of M.M.)
………we are enjoying long walks on the beach
……..Seth has an ear infection, I finally took him to get checked after he has been sick for 5 days. Poor baby boy!!!
………after a trip to the walk-in clinic we went to Crackerbarrel
…….he ate with enthusiasm which was good for me to see.
……..Caleb did, too. He’s been asking for Crackerbarrel ever since we got to Georgia.
……..I ate like a lady (naturally!)
………after I got home we walked by the ocean
………another delightful stroll along the water’s edge
……..I saw a cool insect by the mailbox aaaaaaaaaand I have received 3 postcards from you bloggy friends so far. Cheryl you were the first and today was Kitty and Connie. Thank you!!!! It’s been such fun to get happy mail! Be looking for return mail ASAP!
…….two helicopters Very Loudly flew by as I was reading on the porch upstairs. I was affronted.
…….Rich went for a 5 mile run and I followed along on my bike (he also did 240 push ups, he’s crazy, right?) Truly, I am proud of the way he takes care of himself. But really, the spanish moss is quite beautiful, isn’t it?
Good to be Home 