I took these pictures this morning.  We had a loud rain/thunder/wind storm last night, with snow at the end for good measure.  It was such a blessing to see the sun come out (this was about 7am).  It’s cloudy and cool today, the sun goes in and out from the clouds.  I was going to go walking with Seth but decided the wind and fickle sunshine would keep us indoors today.

I hate to admit, but I am continuing to suffer/struggle here with negative emotions/thoughts.  It’s been so hard.  Couldn’t sleep last night.  Today I am trying to focus on keeping a pleasant face and voice for the children; and no complaining words, or deep sighing. 

When I feel hopeless; I know there is hope in Christ.

When I feel so sad; I know that my joy comes from Him.

The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.  Deuteronomy 33:27

And He said unto me, my grace is sufficient for thee:  for my strength is made perfect in weakness.  Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake:  for when I am weak, then am I strong.  2 Corinthians 12:10

Take therefore no thought for the morrow; for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.  Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.  Matthew 6:34

If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father in Heaven give good things to them that ask Him?  Matthew 7:11

Trust in the Lord and do good; Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.  Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give thee the desires of your heart.  Commit  your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it.

God is my refuge and strength, a very present help in my struggles. 

When my soul fainted within me I remembered the Lord.  Jonah 2:7

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.  Galatians 6:9

That He would grant you according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man.  Ephesians 3:16

One more thanksgiving family post! 

On Friday, Rich and I drove to my childhood home, the place that is IN MY BLOOD and MIND, the smells, the sights, the land, are all so precious to me.  How thankful I am that it is a place I can still return to.  Only a handful of hours away and I can be there.  Mom and Dad are who truly make it home……..

We walked into a feast in the makings.  Mom had a big lunch prepared; roast beef with onions (from the garden), homemade rolls, beets from the garden,  corn from the garden,  pickles made from *cucumbers from the garden*, creamy mashed potatoes (also, from the garden).  Truly, a harvest worth praising God for!  And all so wonderfully prepared.  We ate and ate and then went outdoors to play/run/walk it off.

Agent Orange, cat of the place, watched. 

The men/boys played football, not a game, but catching and kicking to each other.  It is a quiet, country road with practically no traffic, so they could spread out with enough room to play.

They all love football. Actually, let me mention….that they were all wanting to play, but couldn’t find a ball.  When my brother Dave called to say he was coming up, I asked him if he had a football (he didn’t), and he surprised us by stopping on the way to buy a new one, and a pump, and a soccer ball for the little boys!  So kind of him.

Rich

Dear Dad

Watching the ball.   Sometimes it was next to impossible to know where it would end up being kicked, Rich’s goal was executing a powerful kick (with accuracy of secondary importance).

Dad, kicking the ball (not seen, but truly, it was there, up and away, flying)……..

Big Jake

Little Sethers

Brother Isaac, petting the cherished, very old, family dog BRUTUS.

Dad, getting ready for Ethan’s throw.

The hat.is so cute.

Good ol’ E.

Seth’s first kick!

Uncle Dave (the gift bringer) also gave the boys each a keychain from his recent trip to Greece.  Ethan wanted a few rocks and Uncle Dave brought him back some. The girls got pretty bracelets.  His wife’s family is from Greece and they went on a trip of a lifetime to meet Aunts, Uncles, and cousins.  Dave showed me some amazing pictures…..I’ll have to try to blog some of them, if they agree! 

Caleb was stuck to Uncle Dave the whole time, and wanted him to come home with us.

***********************

It’s raining here today.  I took Grace to the doctors this morning and she’s home with me today.  We’re hoping she’s all better by tomorrow, but it’s sure nice to have her cozied up on the other end of the couch with me.  We have a fire going in the wood pellet stove.  I could snuggle here all day.  However, Seth is currently as busy as ever, getting into stuff in the kitchen.  He keeps telling me that he wants to make cupcakes and he’s probably going to try to make them all by himself so I guess I better go tend to him.  (but, as I already told him five times, we’re not making cupcakes today, there are still muffins left from yesterday’s baking!)

(hugs)

Shanda

PS, Beverly:  I received your gift.  I LOVE IT.  Please, if you see this, send me your address again because I could not decipher it from the package. 

Cinnamon:  I got your lovely letter (you have beautiful handwriting!) and I hope to write you back soon.  Thank you so much, especially for those beautiful Scriptures you wrote out. 

PSS, Seth wasn’t making cupcakes.  He was dishing out a bowl of ice cream for himself.  He’s now sitting by the fire eating it.  What a boy!

She’s loved Jesus for a long long time.  His love shines through her eyes and in her gentle smile.

94 years old.

Sarah is the baby named after her and she eagerly brought out baby pictures to see if there was a resemblance in the two of them. (there is!)

Rich had a fine time, looking through old family photo albums.

She held Sarah’s feet in her still-lovely hands.

From her chair, she meets and greets, smiles, talks, listens, and reads books to anyone who comes near.

Her house is warm and familiar, it’s quiet and slow paced. 

She has many grandchildren, many great grandchildren, and she loves and prays for them all.

Grandma always made you feel
 she had been waiting to see just you all day
 and now the day was complete.  ~Marcy DeMaree

She and Grace share a name, too.  They both have the middle name of Lillian (in fact, Grandma is known as Lillian, she goes by her middle name).

Davy went outside to explore every chance he got.  One time I went outside to check on him and he had found an old rusty horseshoe. Another time, he was up on the deck railing, spinning the clothesline around and around.

There were so many things he wanted to talk about with his Great Grandma, but sometimes she could not hear what he was saying.  I became the trumpeting voice of “translation”.

Jacob and Ethan weren’t able to see Grandma this time because they were visiting their other grandparents.

She is Rich’s Dad’s Mom.  Her prayers and influence have been a huge part of Rich’s growth as a man, and as Christian.  She’s been a wonderful light for both of us through the years.  How we love this lady.

Her fortitude is amazing; she’s had bone cancer for about 2 years.  During our entire visit there wasn’t a word about it, or a complaint.  She was just so happy to see us.  It had been too long between visits but we hope to get back to her place again in the next month or so, for Christmas. 

Can a sister also be an angel?

I don’t know….but the fact is,  my sister has been a blessing of immense proportions to me, always, but especially in the last week.

When I thought I was going out of my mind with anxiety and despair, she came to my house and never left me alone.  When I went to the ER with a panic attack/rapid heartbeat (on advice from my doctor), she came and did not leave my side until 11:30 at night, when Rich finally arrived back from a business trip out west.

She held my hand, she snuggled with me on the couch as we watched cooking shows, she let me lean on her for advice when I couldn’t think straight, she talked to me and somehow even made me laugh and change into *pretty clothes*. 

Big round of applause for SISTERS! Thank you, Amanda, for your love and support.  You are my angel. 

(She baked cookies and brownies and took extra good care of my children, too!)

And thanks, Jason, for helping to free your wife, so she could come stay with me.

I love you guys!

“Worry weighs a person down, but an encouraging word cheers a person up.”  Proverbs 12:25

So.  Family.  Wow…..being with them, in the midst of them…MY OWN family, was like

a warm blanket

therapy

rest

comfort

a cup of tea

BLISS.

There were several times in the week leading up to Thanksgiving when Rich and I thought we would not make it, because of my fragile state of mind (um. never ending tears?) but praise God He gave me the strength to put my children (who would have been so sad if we cancelled) and family FIRST, and go.  GO. 

We met at a beautiful, huge, hotel, by a lake.  After eating a delicious buffet dinner (in a big, airy room with lots of windows and natural light and views of the lake) we went outside for some pictures and a little walk.

This is Makayla Lynn, my adorable little niece (who has the same middle name as me!)  She turned five on Thanksgiving day.  She’s so beautiful and a joy.

This is her lovely Mama, my sister in love~ Melissa:

My wonderful brother Nathan, and Melissa.  They’ve been married for 6 years and are doing so well raising their children in the Lord.  Thanks for calling me that day, Nate, it was so encouraging.  Love you. 

This is their son, my little nephew Gregory (named for my Dad)

And Amanda’s little Naomi Isabella, who was a very willing model for her Aunt Shanda.

We were by *a lake* and of course the BOYS all got as close to it as possible.

My little Davy came up to me in the midst of the family gathering  and said,

“MOM?  Don’t look down.”

But, I did.

We were facing the lake in this picture and you can see the hotel behind us.   I thought it was so typical of the men to somehow have footballs on hand for a little game on Thanksgiving day.  There was such a nice family atmosphere everywhere.

Siblings, Shanda*Isaac*Amanda*Nathan (missing:  dear David, who was sick) 

My Mama, and Miss Grace……

Mom, Thank you for all your loving calls to check on me, and to talk to me.   You’re the best mama a girl could have. 

And, the last picture taking on this special Thanksgiving day was of my precious Dad, hugging his girlies.

I LOVE YOU, Dad!  Thank you for being a prayer warrior, father, and friend.

After our dinner and visit, we all parted ways, but happily Jacob and Ethan were able to go home with my Mom and Dad to spend the night and make some memories with their grandparents and Uncle Isaac.

Rich and I took the remaining 5 children to a hotel for the night, we had two adjoining rooms and we put all five kids in one so the two of us could be ALONE in a QUIET room.  So, it worked out very nicely.

The next day, we went to visit one of our most cherished family members.

Tomorrow I will share the pictures from that time.

THANK YOU FRIENDS for praying for me as I have been recovering from depression and severe anxiety.  Today was the first day in a very long time, that I didn’t cry, not even once, didn’t even choke up.

PRAISE GOD!

(((hugs)))

We drove to Cooperstown, to enjoy a Thanksgiving dinner buffet with my family at a big, beautiful hotel.  We were all together except for my dear brother Dave (who was sick) and his wife.  After a wonderful meal, we went outside for a couple of family portraits.  I’m so thankful for the blessing of family. 

More photos to come, soon!

The day began.

I heard noises coming from the kitchen; I remained, lazy, in my bed for half an hour longer.

Up at six.

Good morning, children! 

“I woke up late” says Grace.

“I had to go wake her up,” says E.

“In my sleep I forgot all about school and when I woke up I thought, ‘What in the world is he doing in here at this time of day!” said Grace.

I thought it was quite responsible of E to wake his sister.

I fixed Grace’s hair for her.  She simply does not care what her hair looks like.  I give her another year or so, or maybe she won’t be the type of girl that spends a lot of time in front of the mirror?  Time will tell, for now she is not, not at all.  Mama still helps.  She sure cleans up nice, though.  Pretty girl.  “Would you like a pony or a braid today?” I asked.  “A PONY!” she answered, and she didn’t mean the hair style, either. 

The day began.

We got to see the sun rise! 

By and by, I managed to get five children out the door for school.  Lunches,  homework, and all.

Seth and I made cupcakes.  He insisted, then he and Sarah both ate two (after a proper breakfast, that is).

I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned.  I regretted the days I brought STUFF into the house.  We have too much, too too much.  I want to give a lot of stuff away; donate books (?, yes, books!) clothes, toys, and throw away junk.  I’ve been in this spirit for days (I threw away my bread machine that I’ve had for 14 years, I haven’t used it for about 10)…..why hang on to old stuff?  It just clutters my life and gives me more to clean up. 

As our daily habits dictate, Seth and Sarah and I went outside for a lot of the morning.  I do this with an ulterior motive, mothers everywhere can guess; it tires the children out and makes them SLEEP better, at naptime.  Hee hee.

We began our adventures by photographing a few hideous chickens.

She begged me, with her eyes, not to notice her in this state.

As you see, she is molting. 

It is a depressing occurrence in her life; she doesn’t even have the spunk to lay her daily egg.

Feathers are everywhere, just not *where they are supposed to be*.

Not all the girls are in such a state, this yellow (is it Margaret?  Or Fluffy?  Only my children know.) is still lovely.  Then why, I ask, is she also not laying HER daily egg?  No one’s laying eggs for me.  I had to purchase two dozen this week!

Sarah’s silly face.  I took her picture and then she wanted to see it.  She knew it would be silly.

We saw an old bird’s nest in the (now bare) bushes by the house, so we explored a little.

Seth happened to dress in the same color as the pretty red bush outside.

As all good explorers do, we also made a discovery.  These berries were growing on a vine, I have never seen these before.  It almost looks like a yellow coat peels up and off the red berry.  It’s an interesting wild plant that makes me wish again for a New England berry identification guide.

This is the nest we saw.  Comfy looking, isn’t it?

Hope you’re having a wonderful day, friends.

((hugs))

Leaving baby tapping around the house in her Sunday shoes, and big brother doing homework, and little brother napping, and Papa snoozing on the couch; the rest of us visited nearby S______ Mountain for a Sunday afternoon walk.

We came upon many other happy walkers, with hair wisping in the breeze, pink cheeks, a ready smile, a friendly hello.

I was with four of my dearest friends.   Our feet went awalkin’ and some of us (not I) even went aclimbin’………in the cool fall air of a beautiful day and in the fragrant, crispy, brown leaves upon the ground.

Caleb took his capgun, and we had a hard time keeping him from aiming it at all those other happy people.  It ended up being quite the training opportunity.   I think he finally got it by the end of the walk, much to Ethan’s relief.

Grace did some rock climbing. 

These tree mushrooms were so hard, and solidly attached, that Caleb thought for sure he could use them to climb up, up, up…….

Our sweet little Caleb.  I love how the sun is shining the tiniest glint of light in his happy eyes.

My 13 year old boy.  He’s done so much growing through the years, and his life gives me hope for the other little boys (namely, busy Seth) in our family (busy boys WILL calm down!). 

Ethan was doing his homework yesterday before our walk, with Grace and Jacob, and I heard him say to no one in particular, “I love school.”  I heard him, I was so deep down happy for him. 

He still had his church shirt on for our walk, so handsome. 

Friendships in our own home, to be deep and true and heart-satisfying, must be formed by the patient knitting of soul to soul and the growing of life into life, just as in other friendships.  JR Miller

We walked up the observation tower steps, carefully, and these two stood at the railing together, quietly talking as I kept an eye on Davy and Caleb.  I wondered what they were saying.

“There are brothers who have no friends so close as their own sisters; there are sisters who confide and trust in their own brothers as in no other friends.”  JR Miller

Davy and Caleb, bless their hearts, were a little scared so high up.  David even exclaimed how he was so glad we didn’t have his baby sister, Sarah, along. 

So, they went back down the stairs ASAP.

“I don’t trust these stairs!”  ~  Davy, age 9

We all started walking back down the mountain, to our vehicle, to get back home.  Grace and I discovered this tree, which had several holes in it like this one.  We saw a nut in one.  We wondered, who’s busy work is this? 

This photo is from this morning.  We went for a walk before lunch and Seth INSISTED that he was going to push the stroller (remember, I told you a few posts back, that pushing strollers is all the rage?)

It was fine until he got too tired and STILL wouldn’t give up.  He got very very mad when I took it from him, but I had to do it because got so tired that he cried every time we hit a rough spot (about once every several seconds).

Seth is an amazing, smart child.  He helps me do dishes, wash the table, puts away silverware, helps me tuck in baby for naps, loves to have books read to him, “golfs” and plays baseball, and also dresses himself each morning and every time he gets a little bit of water or dirt on himself he changes his clothes.  If he gets an idea in his head it is very hard for any of us to change his mind.  I just have to be very careful to help him grow as he also learns to OBEY and learn BOUNDERIES.

Most of our trees are bare, most of the leaves are down and brown, but if you look for it, you can still find some color.

A wonderful world.

God made it for us to enjoy.

This morning I saw a tiny little scolding chipmunk tucked in the crevice of a branch.  He was mad at the kitten playing down below, and then he scolded the bluejay that flew too close to him.  He made quite the racket.

The moon has been lovely lately.

Seth and I planted 25 bulbs today.  Something to look forward to, in the spring.

The LORD is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy.  The LORD is good to all: and His tender mercies are over all his works.  Psalms 145 : 8,9

(Last night, Jacob held Sarah, she cried in protest but he didn’t let go until she settled down.  Then she was fine and they snuggled on the couch together watching TV and playing with my phone.) 

The children didn’t have school today because of Veteran’s Day.  It’s been so nice that I wonder if some of my recent sad feelings have been triggered by the huge change of having them gone half the day.  Now I know that we can look forward to these vacation days and that it will feel so good and right, being together again.

We spent some of our morning outside.  As you can see, we needed hats.  Funny hats.  Seth’s was a lion hat and he said “roar! roar!” a lot.  While they were busy playing, and he was still roaring, I decided to run around the pond for a little exercise.  As I ran off, I heard Seth start to cry and yell, “Mama, come back!  Me not scary!”  He thought I was running AWAY FROM HIM.  LOL

It was a little on the chilly side, but we kept warm by playing.  The boys had fights with sticks, and they all did some jumping on the trampoline and swinging, throwing rocks, running around……

Seth was a little emotional outside.  He was happy one minute (when everything was going his way) and then sad (when things weren’t going his way).  I tried to get a picture of him several times and I was finally successful when he was swinging.  He can’t keep the smile off his face when he’s swinging~

After about an hour of fresh air, we went inside to watch BUSY TOWN.  I thought Sarah was too cute, this is one of the first times she’s watched a show.

I hope this helps. 

I found sweet Grace, writing a letter on her bed, with her cat.  Grace turned 12 on the fourth, when she was at her Grandma’s house.  She’s getting mature in many ways, but the little girl comes out still and makes my heart sing.  I’ll recognize a silly face, or a certain tone of voice, and I remember she’s still my little girl.  Always.

I gave her horse puzzle for her birthday and she’s been working on it.  She loves puzzles.

Strollers are all the rage here.  Rich and I bought an umbrella stroller for Sarah when we were staying in the hotel last week, and Sarah has a new stroller for her baby doll, so the brothers are having a great time racing them around.  In fact, fighting over the stroller is what prompted me to have one of the boys write “I want to be nice” earlier in the day.  It’s also why the stroller is now put away out of sight. 

But, before it was taken away, they made up a fun game involving quarters.  When it was David’s turn to ride, he would give Caleb a quarter and Caleb would push him to the top of the driveway and then RACE him down the length, with David hanging on for dear life.  And little Seth trying to keep up.  David got four turns (for 4 quarters) and then it was Caleb’s turn again.

I put the little ones to bed after lunch and then the other children played the computer. 

While the boys were in my room playing, Grace and I tried to find something on TV.  There was nothing to interest me, so she watched the Animal network (of course) and I did something I haven’t been relaxed enough to do in months;  I SLEPT on the couch.  I just woke up a little bit ago and I’m still here, under blankets. Seth is snuggled up by my side (he just woke up, too).

How’s your day going?

Hello dear friends,

How are you?  We are finally settling down here at home after 8 days of no electricity.  Rich, baby Sarah, and I arrived home on Sunday afternoon, and Rich’s Mom brought the children home on Tuesday afternoon.

The area towns and rural outskirts were devastated by our October snow storm (which I blogged about, a few posts back).  The tree and power line damage were monumental; no one had ever seen such a thing.  Huge branches broken, multiple trees fallen and resting on stretched power lines on every road, leaves, twigs, and tree pieces everywhere.  The clean up still continues.

Our local school was closed for a week, and even now the bus routes have been changed to avoid the possibility of problems on the back roads.  We have to drive the children to the end of the road for pickup and drop off.  It has made me very thankful for door to door *bus service* on normal days!

As for myself, this last week has been an amazing testimony of the goodness of God.  When I was at my breaking point, He lovingly gave me the opportunity to rest, as we sheltered in a quiet hotel, and do almost nothing, for days.  There have been ups and downs, mentally, for me.  I hate depression, but even as I struggle and wrestle, I love what God does regardless, I love the gifts of His Word that comes to mind at just the right moment, the reminders that “all is grace”, everything is a gift from HIM, and has already been given.  “Be still and know that I am God.”  In my deepest despair, He is always there and I can rest in His very generous and plentiful promises.  I love Him.  And I thank you, Father.

********************************************

Rich and Sarah, at the hotel.

Sarah, pushing her baby up and down the hotel hallway.

We worked on cleaning up trees on Monday.  My farm-raised husband is so attractive to me.  He is capable, a hard worker, and looks strong and handsome as he works.  We both enjoyed the feeling of working together (yes, I helped!) outdoors in the clean fall air, with the smells of sawdust, chainsaw, and fresh wood (a scent from both of our childhoods).

I’m going to make one of those Christmas centerpieces out of the larger log; with candles and pine branches.  I’ll show you when I’ve got it done.

As I walked the dog (with a sob ever-ready) on Tueday morning; my anxiety was discouragingly heavy, I prayed, I talked to the Lord; and He showed me things, like this milk-weed fluff, from their seed pods.

So soft, warm, and beautiful~

It’s now in the house….I put it in an old candle jar and put it on my windowsill.

And this golden leaf, with red veins and a red tip.  The sunshine made things glow that day.

Rose hips, I admire them every fall, for their dark dark red color.

They are full of seeds and thick red “sauce”, I find nature-study so facinating (strange?but true)

It was a 60 degree day, warm enough for my orange toes to see the light of day, but cool enough in the shade for some remaining snow to stay frozen.

Rich’s mom sent me a few pictures of the children, like this one.

I cried to see their happy eyes and smiles.  They had SUCH A GREAT TIME.

Happy Caleb!

I urge my friends to study the Savior today, look in the gospels at His compassion and mercy.  That’s our Savior, and He amazes us with his love and great works. 

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face.”

Look up!  He is the lifter of our heads.

You are loved!  So greatly, so abundantly.

And, I have a fun link to share with you if you like coloring!  CLICK HERE

((warm hugs))

Thank you for stopping by today.

Shanda