These are good questions, but I cannot claim them as my own, a young lady sent them to me a few weeks ago. I just copied and pasted her whole message into my blog. Thanks for taking the time to answer, I will be looking forward to reading the responses.
Grace is improving every day and her biggest complaint currently is “my head hurts”.
“I have just thought of some “dear older lady” questions related to things I have been struggling with lately. How do you live “simply”? What are some ideas that you have for when children are little to keep things peaceful and simplistic? I feel like I keep trying to keep things simple and not try to keep up with society but life still gets so busy.
How did you choose to be content? I have a lot of dreams (moving out to the country, having a bigger family, adopting special needs,etc) I haven’t felt like God has cleared the way for them yet but I stuggle with trying to plan and work it out on my own, instead of just living for today. Since my dreams haven’t happened yet, I have a hard time being content because I am excited to move forward.”
~from purpleamethyst76’s xanga message box~ 
Good to be Home 
How is everyone over there today? Let’s see….. living simply, huh? One thing I would say that helps is to keep TV to a minimum. I think kids see all those nasty ads and want stuff they see. (not to mention the trash that goes into their spirits from some of the shows.) We never had a TV until my girls were older, and they played so nice, were very creative and never begged for the “latest and the greatest.” I worry about how glued to computers, TV and video games many kids are these days. There’s a big, glorious world out there to be explored, and some of them don’t even know it.
I love how you are giving your children a love and respect for nature. I think this also helps to build a good foundation in them, and to teach them to appreciate the beauty in simple things.
It really doesn’t take owning lots of things to feel content. If there is love in your home, if you have basic needs met, and if people are occupied in doing worthwhile things and serving each other, you can be at peace. We were poor growing up, but we never knew it! We had the great outdoors, love and support from family, a deep faith, and plenty of fun in the treehouse, the creek, the field, and with our pony.
I also think it is important to have some structure in the day. I see so many young moms who have no idea that their screaming little toddler needs a nap instead of to be dragged around the mall. A sense of order, regular times for meals and chores, and rest help to keep a family centered and at peace.
Lastly (aren’t you glad?) I think as soon as children are old enough, they need to be involved in helping those who are less blessed than they. Whether it is helping in a food kitchen, sending boxes of used toys and clothing to an orphanage, or baking cookies for shut ins, our kids need to learn to serve. I think this counteracts the selfishness that can so easily creep in. It brings a feeling of satisfaction, and helps them learn it is more blessed to give than to receive.
Oh, my! I never stop keeping that goal in front of me.
Things that have worked for me:
1. Never let the “world” or anyone else determine who I am, how I serve God, or how Cerwin and I chose to be a couple or family. Being myself simplifies.
2. Keep a wise daily schedule. Get up, work, relax, and go to bed on schedule that works for me. Not keeping a good sleep schedule effects the next day – and the rest. Following this pattern on normal days gives me energy for unusual days (like the past few months) or endurance for stressful days.
3. Don’t spend money on “things” I don’t need or won’t use. Never use a credit card for things I can’t pay at the end of the month. Debt complicates life.
4. Make sure that what I want is what God wants for me. He may have given me a dream, but that doesn’t mean the dream will be fulfilled TODAY. Be faithful today. Walk and live with Him today. Do what I can to move toward making that dream happen, but don’t make it happen at the expense of my family or my peace of mind. Allow God to fulfill my life.
5. I even follow simplicity as a principle for my blog. I found a style that is me and kept it. That way I don’t spend a lot of time looking for new colors and fonts. I am free to spend all my blog time on displaying my photos – which I love.
In summary: SIMPLICITY IS NOT THE SAME FOR EVERYONE. SIMPLICITY TAKES DISCIPLINE. SIMPLICITY IS A STATE OF MIND.
As usual, I love what danishdoll had to say!Looking forward to the other comments…
Simplicity? That’s always been a challenge! I think we need to make a list of our priorities and also would be good to have a family ‘mission statement’ – just what are our goals for our family. Then when we go to choose what we will be involved in, or have our children be involved in will depend on whether or not that will promote that ‘mission’.
Contentment comes from acceptance. I’m still learning that when it comes to disappointing things. Learn to be content in living TODAY, rather than trying to fill all our tomorrows today! As I am obedient in living where God has me for today, He will open the doors for tomorrow and fulfill (or change!) my dreams.
Great questions….I have been working on simplifying for awhile….I got rid of tons of the girls’ toys..mostly all of the ones that flash or beep or play annoying sounds/music. 🙂 Or were plastic. They still have a few of these things but mainly they have things that are made of natural materials and spark their imagination more. And I’m at the point where I feel I need to declutter again! We try not to get too busy with activities and such….we do some but try to make the majority of our time at home, just allowing the girls to play and learn by play. There is a blog I’ve enjoyed reading in the past (haven’t lately but now that I pull it up again…) it is WalkSlowlyLiveWildly and this girl is big on simplifying….so perhaps some inspiration there. 🙂
I think you are already doing much that is simple, Shanda. You encourage your children’s imagination, rather than supply them with gadgets and toys galore. Things that make a house messy and cluttered. Many of the things DanishDoll said would have been the things I would say. Schedules. More routines. Less TV and computer time. Teach your children to work at home (how will they ever learn to care for their own homes?) and EVERYONE pitches in with cleaning duties. If everyone helps, that gives you a lot more free time.I also think “back to the natural way of doing things” is a great thing, however, no family will die from a cake made from a box or cookies bought from the cookie aisle at a grocery store. (Oops! My “beeper” just went off and I had to take my Mrs. Smith’s frozen peach pie out of the oven!!!) We have wonderful appliances to save us time; so, why do we seem to have so little time compared to families in the 40’s or 50’s who didn’t have the modern conveniences we, now, take for granted?One thing that comes to mind, houses in the 40’s and 50’s had smaller bedroom closets and smaller storage closets. Bathrooms were smaller, kitchens were smaller . . . Hum???? I wonder why? Are we tempted to buy and collect too many things these days? Are we unconsciously “keeping up with the Joneses?” By the way, who even knows the Joneses, anymore? We barely know anyone on our street and we’ve lived here almost 4 years!Another thing (but I don’t see you doing this Shanda), so many children are enrolled in sports teams and music lessons and swim lessons and they’re scheduled for “play dates”, etc. Just some ideas to think about. After being so ill last year for such a long time, I simplified my life. I HAD to or I would have never recovered. I rely on convenience foods for those days I’m too busy or too tired to make a “real meal.” I put away many of the knick knacks I loved, just so I wouldn’t have to dust them. I went through closets and gave the church many of the things I loved, but rally never wore. I’ve done fine having less to wear. I don’t really miss any of those things. I own fewer clothes, and no one seems to notice. My girls own fewer toys and clothes and are growing up well-adjusted.
All I know is that as I’ve gotten older, and my walk with the Lord has deepened with time, I have learned to be content with what I have, AND to see the daily blessings in my life. I find I can do without so many things (well new lens are always nice!) I think the answer to living simple is keeping God 1st in my life. Matthew 6:33
All of these answers are so wise and right. I probably agree most concisely with broncomom and keeping Christ first in all things. DanishDoll is always on the mark and I loved cerwindoris’ answers. And yes, Shanda you actually exemplify the way to raise kids in the right way with the right perspective. You already prioritize their lives in the right way. I am blessed always to see that.
I will be praying for darling Grace. My heart just broke when I read about her need.
And a particular thanks for the lovely card. I sat down with a sigh and read it, placed it on the shelf where I place my special cards when they arrive. What a darling you are! Simply darling! with love in SC
Life is never simple! It’s funny how everybody always say, “Be simple.” But what is simple? We all have brains and feelings that just makes everything complicated! By the way, your kids are all such cuties!
I really like what cerwindoris said…thanks for posting these questions Shanda!
rayray714a
Different Seasons for Different Glories
Around the ‘Burgh right now the irises are in their glory. Daffodils and tulips were out in full bloom weeks back, and all the different flowering shrubs and trees have been taking their turns to show off their God-given beauty in their own time. My yard is a canopy of changing colors as the different glories of nature present themselves, something new and beautiful every few weeks. I am in awe of how God designed his different creations to have a season of glory, individual to it’s own species. I include all of us in that glorious creation as well.
For many months of the year, irises are hidden under the dirt, awaiting their time to sprout, then grow tall, then blossom in all their glory for the time they were created to. Then their blooms fade, drop to the ground, and crawl back down under the soil to repeat this cycle within a year’s time. A specific time and season to bloom and be glorious, and specific time and season to be hidden and dormant.I believe this same type of season change occurs in each of our lives, in our walk with the Lord. I realized this years ago when I was a mom at home with two toddlers. I knew my main ministry at that time was to my children. I was physically unable to do a lot of the things I can do now outside the home. I remember feeling insignificant in the Kingdom of God during that time in my life, but learned right away at just how important what I was doing at home was indeed for the Kingdom! The lives of my two little children were entrusted to me and my husband to raise them up in the ways of the Lord. Now they are two adults who love Jesus and are serving Him! As my kids grew older I was freer and entered into the worship leading ministry, where I continue to serve today. Different seasons different glories.I know there are different times in my life where I feel like I’m hidden and not producing much fruit. I feel like I’m ok with the Lord, but things can appear dormant. I just know God is doing a deep work in me during those times, preparing me for the blooming season! Other times I feel like I have huge blossoms and shining in God’s glory. Different seasons different glories.God knows the seasons of our lives; and regardless of where we are, He’ll use us in great ways if we are only available to Him. So in the hidden times, grow strong roots. In your times of blossoms, spread out full and beautiful! To God be the glory!
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What more can I say? There are some excellent tips here already. I especially like what cerwindoris had to say about not letting others determine what we should be — be yourself!
I just had another thought – a day late and a dollar short! But, oh well!Sometimes I think we add to clutter by purchasing things when we feel blue or down. Another book, something pretty, something maybe even really expensive (after all, WE DESERVE IT!) . . . I’ve been guilty and most everyone I know has done the same thing.I have learned to treat myself to new plastic measuring spoons (less than a dollar), a kitchen towel, $1.00), and yesterday I bought a new hand-crank can open because mine was beginning to get tough to turn. I keep them in 3 different drawers and one of them was not wanting to work easily. Rather than choose the “Kitchenaide” prettier, expensive version, I chose the Wal-Mart $1.99 version. I threw out the old one and didn’t feel guilty today because I spent $2.00 yesterday; and, it was great not almost breaking my wrist when I opened a can of soup last night!Sometimes I think we try to buy things to cheer us up and then feel sick to our stomach when the bill arrives; or, worse yet, when we still feel down and out and that new “toy” wasn’t really what we needed. God’s Word is the best thing for the blues. It’s what we need FIRST and foremost.If you really need something tangible, keep it cheap, cheap, cheap . . . because it probably isn’t the answer to your feeling down and out, anyway!
Sing. Sing songs of praise to the Lord….sing silly songs with your children…sing old hymns that they may never learn unless you sing them. This is so simple but so beautiful.
Force yourself to make a cup of tea (in the teapot – not the microwave!), put a cookie on a pretty plate and go outside. Enjoy a 5 minute moment with God in His creation. Then….JUMP back up to work with a reenergized heart!
contentment comes from believing that God has the very best in mind for me and that the “right now” of my life is part of that plan!Simplicity comes from spending lots of time together~relationships over things. Relaxing in the midst of the not so perfect.