TO OUR VALUED CITIZENS:
A tail was found on the beginning of the trail leading up to the watershed area on H Road yesterday. It was found by one of our Most Curious and Observant Citizens, who says the tail was in one piece, dry, clean and neatly removed from whomever it belonged to. It is approximately five inches long, three inches wide, and shaped like a flat oval with a slight point at the top and bottom. The tail is burnt-orange-brown in color, with black around the outside, and tipped with blond fur, quite lovely to see and very light in weight. The person who lost it surely must miss such a glorious tail as this.
If you or a loved one is missing a tail, or if you see someone walking about tail-less, please call 000-000-0000, day or night. The number will connect you with the Observant Citizen who kindly found and reported this missing item of interest. She also is quite emphatic to relate, that she requires no payment or reward for service rendered, and is very willing to sew the tail on the unfortunate one who lost it, with firm thread tied in a strong knot.
Attached are two photos of the tail, but alas, they aren’t attached to the owner, only to this report.