On Friday night I started falling asleep before our tv program was over so I gave up and went to bed. A few hours later I woke up to complete stillness in the room and thought, “Wow, Rich never came to bed, he must have fallen asleep on the couch!” Nothing gets by me even in the middle of the night……I don’t even need lights to get to the bathroom at night. Thus I got up and blindly walked around the bed to the bathroom and then when I was done, to save myself some steps, I started crawling over Rich’s side of the bed to get back to my side. To my shock and horror, I landed right on top of my husband who was flat on his back, peacefully asleep. He woke up startled, grunted, and reached out his hands to grab my arms and help me over which I thought was strange but I quickly backed up while apologizing and went back the way I came, which was around the bed and not over the bed. I crawled under the covers meekly on my side and held my breath. Thankfully he fell right back to sleep and so did I. By the next morning I was laughing and laughing. I had never jumped on top of my husband while he was sleeping before. Although I secretly knew he wasn’t really trying to be chivalrous and gentlemanly about helping me get over him, it made for a good story. I also wanted to see if he would react to my altering reality slightly. After hearing me tell the tale to the children multiple times that morning he finally spoke up and teased, “You can go right ahead and keep telling yourself that I was trying to help you but I was really trying to protect myself, I was in a very vulnerable position.”
And that’s the truth.
At least he didn’t protect himself by punching which is what some people would do if someone landed on them in the middle of the night :):)