I’ll be forever thankful that God gave Rich and I five sons. Seth (our fifth) is almost three yrs old, and I still can’t get over it. I LOVE HAVING ALL THESE BOYS! (and my two girlies, too) The boys did the gingerbread house the other night, it was quite the production. It wasn’t peaceful UNTIL I put my foot down to the debates and bickering. 
If you squint and lean in, you might make out Ethan, Grace, and Jacob. They were invited up to the pulpit on Sunday, to recite their Scripture; Isaiah 53:1-6. They did very well.
True story. Our cat Socks fell in the pond. Jacob was outside shooting pond ice with his bb gun when all of a sudden he saw the cat in the pond, swimming back to shore. He had fallen off a rock. It was amusing to watch him busily clean off his fur for about an hour, in the house, to get dry again. The children said he used up one of his nine lives.
Davy made this plaque in art class, at school. He was so excited to bring it home, and he carried it from the bus to me (on the porch), behind his back with the sweetest shy smile. I asked him, “What made you put LIFE IS GOOD on it?” “I was thinking of you when I made it,” he said. {heart melts} Later on, I showed it to Rich, “See what Davy made me at school?” And David quickly informed me, “Um….it’s not for you, it’s mine.” Oh. oops.
We spent a cozy afternoon this weekend, watching a movie together. “The Santa Clause” (kinda dumb, but funny in parts). What’s your favorite holiday movie? I like “Little Women” (the 1990-something version). The children like “Fay’s 12 Days of Christmas” and “Arthur’s Perfect Christmas”.
I don’t drink ANY COFFEE ANY MORE. I’m off it completely. It’s all tea, all the time now. I’m drinking the African Rooibos right now, as I blog.
This was yesterday afternoon’s cup of camomile, with my current delicious read.
He dumped it on the floor two other times, on other days. You would think I would have put it up? But no, apparently my brain these days is not as sharp/quick as it should be.
I went outside this morning for just a few minutes, to wave goodbye to Caleb. He MUST have me always waving when he leaves for school. So, I did, and when I came in I found the little ones, not watching their show, but making a mess!
You mothers understand, I know you do. I can’t be the only one to clean up crazy amounts of vegetable oil, eggs, or, in this case the BUCKWHEAT PANCAKE MIX.
No fair to the mix. It wanted to be added to eggs, milk, and oil, and fried into healthy pancakes.
Pancakes that NONE of my children cared for, anyway, but still…..I was going to use it up eventually.
Seth took care of that. No more buckwheat pancake mix. It’s all gone now, all except what is left forevermore, deep in the cracks of the hardwood floor.
Those pants aren’t supposed to be white, at all.
It was everywhere.
I was so upset yesterday. Crying. SICK of crying. Mad. On the verge of swearing (and I’ve never done that!LOL) Just so sick of being a mess…….but, truth be told, there are bright spots. Yesterday pretty much stunk, but when Rich came home I sat on his lap and felt better. He told me to TRY, to FIGHT against the emotions. You know, sometimes it seems impossible, but he said the right thing to me at that time.
Today has been better. After getting Rich off to work and the children off to school, and cleaning up the buckwheat pancake mix (ahem), I took Seth and Sarah with me to the mall. And, do you know what happened? I BONDED WITH THEM. We shopped at Target and they were kinda a handful, but after that I took them to Panera and we three sat at a table together, each in our own chair. Seth and Sarah shared a cookie and chocolate milk and I had a smoothie and a bagel and we sat there together and THEY WERE LIKE MY LITTLE BUDDIES. There was sincere friendship in the air. ((loved it)) Seth almost fell of his chair and he was concerned that baby would, too. But we all stayed put and enjoyed our snack together. It was just what we needed to get through the rest of our trip in high spirits. I think I am finally done with my shopping.
I put the littles to bed after some reading time, back here at home, and I went downstairs and did THREE miles on the treadmill. Walking and running greatly relieves the stress I’ve been feeling. I highly recommend it as a stress-buster. Plus, I’m finally getting a little toned after have Sarah Joy 18 months ago!
That’s a little bit of what’s been going on here at our homeplace. I’m thankful for my family, and for Christmas time. I love seeing our pretty tree here in the livingroom and seeing the excitement of the children growing after each loop is torn off our Christmas paper chain.
I found a beautiful passage of Scripture today:
….”If you devote your heart to HIM
and stretch out your hands to HIM,
if you put away the sin that is in your hand
and allow no evil in your tent,
then you will lift up your face without shame;
you will stand firm and without fear.
You will surely forget your trouble,
recalling it only as waters gone by.
Life will be brighter than noonday,
and darkness will become like morning.
You will be secure, because there is hope;
you will look about you and take your rest in safety.
You will lie down, with no one to make you afraid….”
~Zophar the Naamathite, to Job, in Job 112:13-19
Blessings and love to you~ take a minute, to write to me today? Thanks dear ones.
Love, your pal, Shanda
Good to be Home 
Love you so much dear one! Praying for you in these times. I am thankful for all of your beautiful family, for our golden days with you, and for your relationship with Rich. So thankful that he can hold and comfort you. You are amazing as you carry on throughout. I know that those family moments give joy. Praying for joy, peace, and grace for you. David showed me a video of a mom and two boys who had dusted the entire living room with flour. It looked like it had snowed, it was all over the furniture. She kept saying “oh my, I don’t know what to do” as she filmed the mess and her two culprits. So yes, you are not alone. Please ask all for prayers for my boy, new round of feeling awful. Don’t know what to do.
I wonder how many of the 9 lives the kitty has used up? 🙂 The buckwheat pancake mix is awful….my kids wouldn’t eat it either….at least Seth got to have fun and enjoy the buckwheat….I think it’s the only way I would have enjoyed it too. *giggle*I understand (totally!) about the crying, anger and exhaustion. The doctor told me NOT to fight off the emotions (because I tend to bottle them up) she said muddle through the emotions- and then “Train my brain” to think differently…to sort out what I CAN do from what I FEEL I NEED to do…. much easier said than done. : /I’ve been on medication for over a month- I really don’t know if it’s helping- except that I’m not needing naps like I used to…in fact its been a few weeks since I even took one.Your Panera/Target trip sounds lovely. Enjoy Christmas. All of it. Be in the moment- and be sooooo thankful that you don’t have to send your kidlets away to another parents house and sit and twiddle your thumbs on Christmas morning….instead of watching kids rip through stockings and gifts……..but, I’m coping. 🙂 Prayers for you, deary. Love, Cass
I can’t tell you how many times we’ve seen Little Women this season.Sophia had scarlet fever a couple of weeks ago…so of course, we HAD to watch it over and over again to see Beth get sick.Sounds like life is full but wonderful. =)Merry Christmas week.
hello friend-
i say friend because i read your blog often but rarely take time to comment- not sure why. the blog world still is strange to me 🙂 your post struck a cord with me today. i know how you feel when you say things like your emotions get the better of you because they are so strong and how you LOVE boys, and even how that beautiful verse speaks to you. I feel the same things. I type one-handed as i hold my 6 wk old little boy (#2 for us) I wanted to encourage you as you have encouraged me so often with your honest outlook, and your aim for biblical perspective. The verses you share and quotes often speak to me. I cant tell you how many times I read and re-read the poem you shared about childbirth (Woman in time of Travail). It comforted my fears about birthing this past time.
I have been reading some in Charlotte Mason’s 6 volume set and her gody perspective have often stood out to me in one way or another. And one things that has helped me FIGHT against the down-er emotions was when she said how God created our brains to be able to form new tracks of thought- or to re-train our habits. My emotions often seem more powerful thanjust a habit, BUT her mantra is that we need to get in the habit of CHANGING OUR THOUGHTS before they over whelm and take over. So I have prayed to GOd to please help me change my thoughts when those situations arise. AND as a testimony to the power of his Holy Spirit, he does!!! His faithfulness is good to me. I think about things like what craft project I want to work on next, or a sweet think about my boys, or the glorious sky outside my window (I too am a nature lover). It is not easy to do this in my own strength, but I pray that God will show his faithfulness to you too. Our battle is not against flesh and blood, but HE has conqured it all for us already and we can claim HIS power in time of need.
I hope that doesnt sound preachy but encouraging.
Thanks for sharing your heart on here as well as all the fun photos of your baeautiful, family, home, life and surrounding nature. I appreciate you!
Bobby Jo in MN
PS. we just got chickens this year and I thought of you! I just watched Little Women while nursing my little one last week. We read that book last winter! So much in common. You are a kindred spirit. Hugs
Hi friend!Good to see your post. Looks like a lot of fun. Love you lots. I can’t believe how Christmas is here again! I wish I had a treadmill too. I need exercise! I wish you all a very Merry Christmas if I do not get to say that to you later. Love ya-B
I know, it DOES seem impossible to fight the emotions, as Rich said, ugh! Especially when the “fight” doesn’t seem to even exist in a single fiber of your weary body! I understand that feeling. It is so good that you are exercising, drinking tea, and continuing to do things like read…it will help strengthen and get you through this. And isn’t it a blessing to have a loving spouse and family during times like this?!That flour mess is crazy and hilarious!
My favorite Christmas movie is The Best Christmas Pageant ever. For books I like “The Birds’ Christmas Carol.” It’s sad but has funny parts. It’s not about birds but about a family named Bird who had a baby girl on Christmas. It’s an old book. Have a wonderful Christmas with your family. Try to get some rest. I always enjoy your pictures and words.
yet another ooops ~ 🙂 Memories, memories, dear Shanda ~ right? Would love to hear from you too ~ have a blessed Christmas ~
Thanks for sharing this Shanda.Your boys are gorgeous (and your girls too). I am so glad to have boys and I have one girl. I suppose in years to come you will look back on these times and see the photos of your boys with the flour and forget (maybe) the cleaning up etc that comes with it. I have a photo of my youngest surrounded in white powder, everywhere.I am sure so many women can relate what you are going through and I will continue to pray for you. Exercise does help with stress. I have been getting together with a friend and walking during the week and it has been a great help. I love tea too and I have rooibos and cammomile. So many lovely teas out there.Thanks so much for sharing the scripture. I love that and it is very encouraging. Have a wonderful Christmas with your family and I hope you get some time to just rest and put your feet up. ((hugs))
i’m always so glad to see a post from you. and, that little buckwheat pancake mess! o my goodness!! what a cute little flour-dusted boy he is! i love how honest you are about LIFE. even when it’s messy and hard. you’re such a good mom Shanda! i wish you and yours a blessed Holiday!!
Shanda you always make me tear up!!! First off the scripture at the end is just what I needed!!! How I love that you share snippets of your life here…it’s so soothing to know someone else goes through the SAME situations as I do. I can relate to every word you ever write on this blog and I am grateful to you for taking the time!!! please come by my xanga if you ever feel alone in your trials!
Evidently your battle isn’t quite over. Things like depression and emotional issues usually don’t just go away all at once. But the fact that you are fighting is surely a good sign, and you know the outcome will be good (promises, remember?)I am so excited to see the mess your boys made! Really….know why? Because it was a box of Hodgson Mill mix, and Hodgson Mill is about 20 miles from my house!!! Really! It’s a real place, a beautiful place, one of historic consequence in our county. Seeing your picture has made me want to write about “our” mills, and I’ll do so right away….right after the first of the new year.Isn’t it a small world? Or is it just that we have a big God, to give us this little, unexpected connection? I think I know the answer! 🙂 Merry Christmas….have a HAPPY one!
Loved reading this! And your pancake mess. 🙂 I have to rush off to make dinner now. Just thought I’d say hi. I’ve been praying for you even though I’ve been a ghost.
Have a wonderful Christmas! The pictures with all that pancake mess sure are precious:) We also love the Best Christmas Pageant Ever…Celebrate Jesus~
Oh, Shanda, there’s never a dull moment at your house is there? I’m so sorry you’re struggling with your emotions and pray that you will get through this period in your life soon! I had a meltdown this morning from stress put on by outside family members and told my husband “next at year I’m going to run away and serve in a soup kitchen!” I don’t even have children at home making messes!! God bless you and your family as you worship our Lord Jesus this Christmas and I pray for you a healthy, happy new year.(((HUGS)))
Oh.My.Goodness.This post brought back some funny memories of my own littles back in the day!I am cutting back on the java, too. I have lots of tea in my cupboard as well. I tend to gravitate toward mint, lemon, and Constant Comment.CC was my mom’s fave tea. She always served it to company in her cobalt blue teapot. No, I don’t have the teapot. Wish I did. Maybe I will come across one someday in my visits to antique malls or auction.Praying you “pass the test” each day.Thanks for coming by again and leaving all those wonderful presents to me in the form of comments.Blessings on you, my friend.D xo
just one day at a time, eh? 🙂 i think EVERY woman alive can relate to her emotions getting the better of her!speaking of swearing.. that reminded me of a conversation a friend and i had recently. she does the sign language at our church and was telling me that the sign for the CN tower in Toronto is the middle finger. once, a missionary speaker kept making mention of it in his sermon {he had just visited it for the first time or something} and we were laughing at how funny that must have looked to everyone around who probably wondered what in the world she was doing!! 😉 my favorite christmas movie is Christmas in Connecticut! have you ever seen it? i think you’d like it. it’s an old one. but.. you can’t beat those classics.i also like miracle on 34th street. again. the old version. ;)this time of year just makes me crave those good old movies especially. that and bing crosby’s singing! :)hope you and yours have a wonderful christmas together dear friend.lots of love~
hi shanda…….blessings and love going right back to you, my friend! thinking of you.
Oh. My. What a mess! Love the “life is good” creation. =) Makes my heart happy too. Merry Christmas to you and yours~
Again, I thank you for your honesty! Sorry you had a bad day yesterday….thankfully those come and go!! I remember when my girls were little those BIG MESSES used to overwhelm me so much! Proud of you for giving up the coffee as that would be major for me!!! And, you’re so right, the treadmill is a WONDERFUL stress-reliever. I’m continue to lift you before the Father!! Love, Jannie
Oh what a mess! I bet they were having the time of their life playing with that! As for favorite Christmas movie, I’d have to say “it’s a wonderful life” or the “bishops wife”Merry Christmas!
Oh, dear friend, that mess… I keep telling myself that these days of mothering and messes will make me smile in the future. I can get so frustrated with the children sometimes. Especially when they create more work for me. (guess when it’s about me…that is selfishness, right? ) Love your stash of tea. I drink entirely too much coffee. I enjoy tea, but don’t drink it exclusively. I have had kidney stones in the past and they say that tea can contribute. (I honestly don’t think I drink enough water, period…) My favorite tea right now is Sleepytime Vanilla…yum.Blessings to you this busy, crazy time of year.
As one who struggles with depression daily and works hard to fight against it.. I so appreciate your honesty and realness in sharing your struggle. Thank you. Glad you had that time at the mall w/ your two little ones and that it was GOOD! Merry Christmas.
Laughing at the cat. You know, he meant to do that though, right? I love that Little Women version too. Many say there’s an older version that is better, but I still haven’t watched it.Despite how you are feeling, you are still finding moments with the children, so I suppose that’s good. I need to work much harder on that b/c I tend to just put walls up around myself and plug the kids in. I’m slipping on my vitamin D b/c I was trying to put my husband on vitamins too, so I am trying to switch us to taking them at dinner, but I’m always rushing around so and forget. I hope you have a pleasant day today. I need to cook and wrap for Christmas. I’ve been having iced tea instead of hot tea lately, I seem to crave it around Christmas.
I haven’t commented before, but just want to let you know how much I enjoy your blog, and the pics of your beautiful family. I have four children, 10,8,6, and 2, and can so relate to that wild mess! I just thought my kids were the only ones that did that:) Please be encouraged, hon, God is so faithful and He is with you. I have struggled with the same things you are going through, and I am praying for you. Oftentimes it seems like no one really understands the waves of negative emotion that come, but just know other mamas struggle with this. May the Lord bless you with peace this Christmas season.
Just saw this post. Had to laugh about the buckwheat pancake mix/mess. I had the same brand and my family made me promise to never EVER make it again!!!