I haven’t been feeling like myself for a few weeks now. Stressed out and tired, I guess.
My doctor is concerned about the increase in my blood pressure over this month, and put me on bed rest yesterday. How this is going to be possible, I don’t know. I plan on resting as much as I can, and trusting God to take care of me when I have to be up and about.
I had blood work done yesterday to make sure that I wasn’t getting preeclampsia. The lab results were fine, thankfully. The pregnancy is going well, baby is actively moving; it’s just Mama who is tired.
One of the things that is making me feel upset is knowing that my husband will be gone again next week on a business trip; from Monday to Thursday night. This is something that I am praying about because I am not sure how I will manage (for instance, music lessons are Monday and Tuesday evenings and if we don’t go the money is wasted).
This morning I plan on making a list of things that I can do from the couch; happy things. Any suggestions?
Little Seth is a dear, and sticks by me so faithfully. He is my littlest buddy and even looked through a Tasha Tudor garden book with me this morning, while pointing at the pretty pictures, and making his little conversational noises.
I know God has everything under control and what a comfort it is to trust Him.
Good to be Home 
Please take care of yourself!! Cast all your anxiety on HIM…he cares for you. Try to only think of today and manage through it. I’m sure thinking of a whole week ahead is just daunting. I’ll be praying for you!! (I’d even offer to help take children to their lessons if I could help…PA is just too far away…sorry).
I am sorry to hear you are not feeling yourself. I am sure the bedrest will help you feel better although hard when you a family to take care of. The time will go quickly. You have a wonderful children and they will help you. Read some nice books to your children from the couch. I am currently reading Understood Betsy to my daughter and she loves it. Conversation Starters (book) is also wonderful as it has various questions you ask your children and it really gets them thinking and responding in regards to a variety of things (my children loved this and it got them quiet and made them think). Questions could also be made up.I was reading an article recently about off-loading things when life gets a bit difficult and it does help to just get right back to basics but that is an individual choice as to how you do that.As far as the music lessons go, as much as you would like to continue them and this is just a suggestion,is it possible to talk to the people who run the lessons to see if something else could be organised without you losing any money for a period of time.One day at a time. Blessings Angela.
Hugs and prayers Shanda. Are there people who could help, get the kids to lessons? Crock pot or freezer meals? Breakfast for dinner? I do know that there is such a thing as pregnancy depression, it’s ppd, but before you have the baby, but I don’t know much about it. Perhaps it is something to look into? Happy things…surround yourself with pleasant things. Have the kids bring flowers in, light candles, favorite blankets/pillows. Magazines, books, journals, color, watch good movies, sew, get online and learn some string games and teach the kids (cat’s cradle anyone?).
You can do a lot of praying, singing, reading, dreaming, cuddling with kids, and enjoying the view! Think positive! Some days I would love to be ordered by a doctor to a bed or couch all day, okay maybe half a day, but make the best of it Shan! Love you, Lish
@Angela – I love the book you suggested about conversation starters, I went right away and looked it up on Amazon and CANNOT wait to get it! Thank you for posting it here so that others can see the ideas!
You’re going thru some tough stuff right now, the good news is that this too shall pass! I’ll be lifting you up in prayer. God truly is concerned about your well being, keep the faith!
Just thought I would add the book I have is Conversation Starters for Parents and Kids by Robert Crosby put out by Focus on the Family.Angela
Shanda Banda, I am so so so sorry to hear that you are on bed rest. It is okay if they miss just this week, think of how much better you will feel if you let go of the stress about getting them to class. You need to have this rest.Okay here is my quick brainstorm of things to do while on bed rest:Read, read read, all the books you will not have time to read after Sarah is born.Listen to sermons, there are so many at oneplace.comDraw with the kidsHave the kids set up “walls” so Sethy cannot leave the living room and enjoy just being still and watching him.Have a little music concert at home and all the kids can sing or play instrumentsBefore Rich leaves have him bring home a great collection of movies, for example you can watch the first season of the Waltons or Anne of Green Gables, old gymnastic videos that you love.Work on your jounral where you paste inspiring things that you clipped, and the kids can make one of their own and do it next to youMemorize scripture, you can do that with the kids too, just think of what a good memory it would be to all learn the same chapter right before her birth!Look through a fun cookbook and then let the older kids make it by themselves while you are on the couch, they can each pick what they want to make. Knit, sewHave the kids do a puppet show, you know the kind Tasha Tudor describes, and the kids can all be involved in writing the play and the set decoration and making the puppets. They can have a goal of having it all ready by the time rich comes home.PRAY, the women at my church who have amazing prayer lives can all point it back to a time when they were on bed rest for one reason or another. There is something about being very still that puts us before the face of God, and makes the prayers so much more intimate.Journal, it does not feel like it right now but you will miss these sweet vulnerable days.Have the children write letters to Sarah and you can paste them in her baby book.Make a list of power verses, the psalms are FULL of them, any verse that will speak truth to you in moments of stress, paint, draw, sketch the verses out on 5×7 cards and make the cards real pretty. Then you will have them to meditate on, and you can use them to preach to yourself when you are feeling down.I will be praying for you and will come back with more if the Lord send more ideas my way. Lots of love!JO
You have received some great ideas for this next week. I would agree with “mymeanderings.” Missing lessons in favor of your health and stress is more than worth the money lost. God bless you.
Praying for you, Shan. You have lots of great ideas here. I would definitely say that unless you can get someone else to take the kids to music, skip it. Love you lots! Hang in there.
Shanda, can your mama come stay? Wish I lived closer; I would come help!
Could you possibly hire someone to come in and help for a week? Or even a few days a week to give you some of the much needed rest you need?
Aw poor girl…hope things start to look up. Don’t worry or fret, God will work out everything. I’ve read several things that blood pressure is directly related to stress and anxiety..so cast all your cares upon Him for He careth for you!As for stuff to do on the couch…how bout sewing, watching movies, scrapbook/journaling, reading, playing board games with the kids, making something cute for Sarah…and I know mymeanderings listed several good ideas as well!
Shanda-take time for you and rest. It is ok to not go to activities for a week. Take a break and rest as much as you can. I wish I could come help you. 🙂 I would. I will call you soon. It’s all going to work out. God is in control. He is with you always, you are never alone. love you
Hi Shanda~ {{Hugs}}You would love Jaynee Lockwoods blog. I have them on my blog list. They are missionaries to Mexico. Which is funny because most of the children and Daddy are blonde haired blue eyed Anyway, With her last (?) child she was on bed rest for a most of her pregnancy. She has TWELVE children. Well she had 11 at the time What she did is such an encouragement to any Mama in any situation. I have been where you are and when I look back NOW I wish I had dealt better with my “stresses”, been more understanding, been more joyful in ~all~ things. It helps me NOW in my life to take it to the Lord and let go. Give up what ~I~ think “needs” to be done and take care of myself when I need to. I bet if you asked your husband he’d say don’t go to music lessons (and the rest) because YOU are the most important thing to him.hugs, Cinnamon
Shanda, Prayers for you in this! Here’s a thought…sometimes I get so stressed about not wasting money that I get entirely bent out of shape and lose perspective of the bigger picture. IE nagging dear husband b/c he doesn’t finish the leftovers and I have to throw them away. But then I step back and think- was $2.00 worth of food worth nagging my husband about and stressing myself out? Now of course we can’t always be wasteful…but maybe this week is one where you can release yourself from wasted money guilt and let the kids stay home from their lessons…deciding that your sanity is worth more than the money saved. just a thought though….blessings to you!
Oh Shanda, how I wish I could bring over some meals or help with the kids or housework. There are so many great comments here, and I agree the world will not come to an end if you just skip activities for one week. As a piano teacher myself, like your teachers, I had to have a strict no-refund policy for missed lessons; however, that was because (among other reasons), I could not pay my bills if my income varied from week to week, according to who came to lessons. It is intended to be viewed as tuition for the year, reserving the teacher’s time and expertise. A few missed lessons per year are to be expected because sickness and LIFE happens; you have good teachers who probably make allowance for this, and your kids are good students and should not suffer from one missed week.It is so hard to be down like that. I told Terry the other day, that crocheting all those baby blankets in my first trimester kept me sane! Jo’s ideas are wonderful, I’m sure they will keep you busy for a while. Also, I was thinking about Rich’s suggestion to write down your dreams. Maybe this would be a good time to do that, since you will have some down time to think and write (well, surrounded by kids most of the time, I realize ). And remember, your family and friends love you so much and are just a phone call away!
P.S. I recently checked out from the library and have been reading that same book!
Hey hun your health is way more important than the lost money of a couple of piano lessons. Don’t worry about that at all, :)Hmmmmm couch fun. How about eye spy with the kids, having one of the kids read to you or to everyone, watch a good movie, or jus plain ole relax while chatting with the Lord!Praying you start to feel better and find relaxing not too difficult.{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}
Well, it appears that you now have PLENTY of ideas for how to spend your couch-time. 🙂 My only suggestion is that you ASK for HELP from those who live near enough to give it….family, friends, church….whoever. I know from experience that when someone ASKS me to help, I am so happy to do it! You obviously have this huge circle of caring friends who are long-distance praying for you, so now you just have to reach out to the close-at-hand ones and be specific. Best wishes for you feeling better, in every way that counts!
Hi Shanda :-} And an extra smile just because :->First off, the thing which you really need to do the most, is to accept the differance between the fact that you have been told to take bed rest, it’s NOT that your being lazy and laying around. In our minds we know that there is a huge difference, but when it comes time to apply the perspective of that difference to ourselves, well, we’re the mom. What kind of mom just lays around all day? What kind of mom makes her kids fix the dinner every night? Etc. I am not saying that applying that difference is easy. Nope, nope, nope (rolls eyes). But once we truly accept that difference, and focus on it, oh – what – a – difference – it – makes !!!! !!!! !!!!I read through the comments others had left for you, and wow do you have good support people in your blogging circle!!!My suggestion is to schedule next week as an ‘adventure’ week with the kids. – Meals – Dinners – each of your older three kids is assigned to fix dinner one night, so Mon. night is your oldest son, then Tues. is your second to the oldest son, and Wed. is your daughter, and Thursday they team work on dinner. Have them pick what they want to make, they can keep it secret from the rest of the family except daddy – he will need to go to the store and make sure they have all of the ingredients they will need on hand. – Meals – Lunches – sons no. 3 and 4 will be responsible for lunches. Have your husband pick up easy sandwich stuff that they like, but you don’t always have. And yes, lunches too can be a surprise for the rest of the family.- Have every day be a different ‘theme’ day. Have your husband stop at the library and video store on his grocery run. – – Let the kids make a fort under the table for one theme day (sheets down the side with heavy books on top), and watch a movie about and read a book about Swiss Family Robinson or some such.- – Have one day be a musical day. Have you ever watched Sound Of Music with your kids? Have the children whom take musical lessons each give musical concerts. The children whom don’t take lessons can do likewise. Empty oatmeal containers make great drums, as do empty egg cartons. Empty paper towel tubes make great trumpets. Empty wrapping paper rolls make great trombones. (Yes, I’ve been known to prematuly empty something to use it for a ’cause’.) Have all of you sing together. Have you taught your kids fun ‘camp’ songs? Have your husband pick up some fun (not to kiddy) sing along tapes/DVD’s.- Etc.Every morning after their cereal for breakfast, have the kids write about the adventure you had all done the day before. Then next weekend they can be read to your husband and the pictures you take can be looked at, and memories will be wonderful!!!!Ideas just for you — do you have a bunch of mending that you’ve been meaning to get to? The time for it has made itself known ;-p- do you have a bunch of old magazines somewhere? Go through them. Cut out the recipies you want to try. Or the decorating ideas you liked. Etc.- you know those hand written letters you’ve thought you probably ought to take the time to write to this and that person? Here’s your time.- Make sure that your husband has CHOCOLATE on that grocery run list, and find a way to stash it under the couch where all eyes won’t see it, but your arm can reach it!!!!I wish you a week so full of special moments, that you find yourself refreshed and amazed!!!your FRIEND,Cheryl B.http://thebzhousethatlovebuilt.blogspot.com
Love you Shanda. I will be praying for you and your little Sarah. I sure know how it feels to have to do enforced rest! Like you are wasting time. But you are NOT! God has a plan for you, your little one, and all your family. He will work out good things in your older children as they need to help you and take care of you. Jo’s list was awesome, and so many other good suggestions. Here are a few things I have found helpful:Reading out loud with the kids. Snuggling together is great to give you rest and take away stress. Listening to scripture. I used to have scripture/songs that help so much to rest in the Lord during times of illness.I very much agree to ask for help from church and friends. People want to help but need to know. Don’t let visitors wear you out however. Assign one older child to one younger child. Then you know who is watching who. You have the right number They can of course trade as I know your two littlest are the most work. God knows your needs and is your help. He will fill in whatever is needed when they miss out some school or music lessons. Take care dear one!((HUGS)) Jenny
Best advice I can give you is do not hesitate to ask others for help!! I was on bedrest for awhile with my 4th and at the time my husband was going away for 2 weeks at a time (working on a project for work). In the beginning, I cried and cried wondering how the heck am I going to do this? My husband then reminded me what great family and friends we are surrounded by, who would be more than happy to help!Rest up and take care of yourself and that little precious girl!
I’m sorry to hear that you are stressed and in need of bed rest. My suggestion is to listen to the Dr. and do as little physical work as possible. You can do all of the wonderful things people have suggested. I would skip the lessons for the week or call someone else to bus them to the lessons (and take the younger ones for the evening maybe). The one thing I have learned lately is that God has not made us to be islands – He wants us Christians to be able to depend on others. You would give help to a friend in need and they will give you the help that you need. In Ecclesiastes 4:9-13 it talks about the cord of three strands is not easily broken. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.Love you.
“I know God has everything under control and what a comfort it is to trust Him.” amen!if i were closer i’d bring you a meal…
instead, sending love.prayers.thoughts across the miles. {hugs}
Oh, Shanda, I’m praying for you!! You’ve got so many great ideas from all your readers…you are so loved!! When I was on a short bed rest with Sam, a lady from church recommended that I memorize Scripture. Sad to say, I didn’t keep up with it. I don’t think I can send a crockpot meal through the mail . Hang in there, dear friend.
So sorry to hear you are on bed rest. Not an easy place to be for a mother, or anybody for that matter. Do you like your feet rubbed? Get your kids to rub lotion on them. Praying that everything will work out, I know you have a lot on your mind right now. ♥
Oh, my! It takes a village to care for Shanda and her family! I love all the suggestions! I had to be on bed rest with my first and second children (low-lying placenta and toxemia). With the 2nd one, a friend came over and helped me make snowflake ornaments with pearl beads. I think you have plenty of good advice in all the comments and of course, so many prayer warriors!
Call your church and ask for meals to be brought every other night for the next couple of weeks. I’ll be praying for you!
It looks like you sure got some great suggestions here and I just wanted to let you know you are in my prayers. You have such a beautiful family and I am glad you continue to share it with all of us.
I am sorry I can’t come help in any way, but I can send hugs, prayers, love, and thoughts to you! 🙂 ~hugs~Lanitha