Well! We made it to Friday by the grace of God!
Have I told you that we’ve had a cold going around and around my family since September? Yesterday my heart sank when Jacob came to me and reported, “I have a sore throat”….by the time supper came he was in tears it hurt so bad.
I sent him to bed right after dinner with a new book on the ipod, Twenty-One Balloons. Jacob got in bed and the other children gathered around him and they all listened to it together, and they loved it. They aren’t quite done with it yet.
I crashed on the couch while they were busy listening to their story. If I wasn’t pregnant I would seriously be thinking that I was suffering from disease, because I am so very tired. Rich arrived home last night at 7 and found me in tears. After a good night’s sleep I felt much better (still tired but happier). My first prenatal appointment is scheduled for November 25, I still haven’t been to the doctor’s for this pregnancy. I can’t wait to go, because they will do an ultrasound at the very first appointment. I just want to know……that everything is okay at this point.
Today is the day the maids came (they come every other week) so we cleaned up all morning (yeah, we clean so the maids can clean!) and then we left when they got here. I took the kids through McDonald’s drive thru for some lunch and then we went the library, for the first time in about a month. It felt so good to walk around with my favorite book list, Honey for a Child’s Heart, and also Honey for a Woman’s Heart, and pick out a big stack of nice books for all of us.
We got home about 2 hours later and the girls were still here, scrubbing away. It feels so nice to have help with the housework.
Now that the maids are gone, I have the children all resting. Grace and Ethan will be picked up soon, to go visit their friends and to have Art class. Jacob usually goes, but I am taking him to the doctor’s, along with Caleb and David, so that they can get the H1N1 nasal vaccine. I wasn’t planning on having them vaccinated, but when I took Grace for her check up a few days ago, the pediatrician highly recommended it. There is a lot of flu going around. I told myself a few weeks ago, that I would trust my pediatricians. Seth has had the vaccine, too.
That’s all the news here for the day.
I do want to take the time to post some pictures from last Saturday. Grace’s 10th birthday was last week and as a special treat, we took her (and “the brothers”) to the American Girl Place in Boston. It was wonderful…the weather was nice so the drive was lovely. Rich and the boys did great at the store, and we all walked around together, letting Grace look at everything.
Years ago, we had bought her Samantha doll at a tag sale of all places. And last year we bought her Nellie, since she was being retired. So Grace took those dolls with her. Here she is, with all the boys behind her. David is partially hidden, almost totally hidden, behind Grace.
She decided before we even got there that she wanted the Indian girl, Kaya. She got the basic doll, along with the food set (it’s SO neat, the food looks real, and it came with a basket that the doll can wear) and the bedding set (with realistic furs). Oh, Grace has been having the most wonderful, imaginative time with her.
Ethan came to me at one point and said quietly, “Mom. Grace keeps trying to show me things!” And I said, “Oh, E, let her show you! Who else is she going to talk to and get excited with?” So, he went back to her. Of course, David and Caleb were the least shy about being interested in……dolls……
I think this picture is cute, Grace is talking to David about the doll display and Caleb is looking out the window, down to the parking lot below;
Grace and her Papa, after Mama decided just what we would purchase. I just love seeing my husband father a daughter! He grew up with just brothers, you know. And he’s doing such a good job with Gracie. He loves her so much.
Here is a picture of us, in the elevator. It’s a family photo that makes me smile. All you can see of Seth is his tiny fingers. The weird lumpiness coming out of my stomach is mirror distortion, I can assure you. Look at the faces of those dear children! So cute, each of them.
I think my girl is as cute as a button. Especially with those jeans, mary janes, and white socks! I’m so glad we had this day together. Who knows if we’ll be able to get the boys to go there again?
I had someone ask me about training children. There have been books written on that topic, but I can tell you a few things that I believe. First of all, please, please, LOVE your children. I would rather see parents concentrate on having a love-relationship with their little ones, than to focus too much on training. Love comes first, then training IN LOVE. The first thing you need to teach your child, is that they must obey right away. No second chances. They need to obey with a GOOD ATTITUDE. The heart is what matters most of all.
Why do we train our children in proper behavior? Because WE LOVE THEM SO MUCH. They will be secure children, if they are happily obeying their parents. We don’t train them to make ourselves look or feel good. That’s pride….and God resists that.
Praise your children.
Enjoy your children. Don’t groan when they get up in the morning, or from their naps. (I remember God convicting me of that years ago!) Smile and say something sweet to them, give them a snack.
Listen to your children. They will want to tell you things, if you are a warm listener.
Read to them and snuggle as you do it. Some of my happiest moments are when one of my children is listening to me read, and thoughtlessly playing with my hair or ear. 
I’ve read the Beatrix Potter books constantly lately. We love The Tale of the Flopsy Bunnies. You know, there are “six leetle rabbits” in that one. And one of them gets hit by a flying rotten vegetable marrow. And is quite hurt. (sorry, I told you I’ve read it a lot lately!)
Say “Please” “Thank you” “I love you” “I’m proud of you” and “I’m sorry” to them. They are learning manners by YOUR LIFE.
More is caught than taught. You have to be what you want them to grow up to be.
Look at them when they talk to you. Think about that nice man, Mr. Rogers (From “Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood” on PBS). Read his biography and soak up some of his views on children and childhood. Rich’s Grandma has that same spirit about her, you just KNOW she loves you and would listen to you even if your story took too long or you were stinky.
Teach them to wait their turn, to not interrupt while you are on the phone, and to clean up after themselves.
Don’t let them get in the habit of crying for what they want. If they cry for something, don’t give it to them.
Make your house a home FOR children…with good books, good art, good music, etc.
Teach them to ask nicely. When Caleb says, “Give me a drink!” He does not get it.
Love their Dad.
Teach your children to work.
Understand and study up on the uniqueness of little boys and little girls. They are different!
Remember, you are the mom so act like it, but at the same time, it’s also okay to be their friend. My children are my little buddies. Do you know? SETH MY PRECIOUS BABY MADE MUFFINS WITH ME. I could cry just thinking about it. My dearest memories are the little ones sitting on the counter, or standing on chairs, to help me cook.
Remember, God GAVE us our children as a gift! What a wonderful gift-giver He is, to give children as GIFTS. We are to accept them with a thankful heart, love them, nurture them and ENJOY them. If you don’t enjoy your child there is something wrong. As I wrote the other day, there are times when I don’t enjoy my children because I am having a bad day or don’t feel well, but IN GENERAL I would count a day lost if I didn’t spend it serving them in a loving way. We have fun together. When Rich is gone with them, I start to feel empty after a while. There is no one to talk to or listen to.
God has taught me so much, by making me a mother. I’m so thankful for this privilege.
Good to be Home 
I love this, Shanda. I took my girls to AG place on Sarah’s 10th birthday too. We had lunch in the bistro and she was given a whopping $200 by all of the family members so she had a big-o’ shopping spree. 😉 It was sooooooooooo much fun. I still get all warm and fuzzy over it- and that was 2 years ago! :)The pic’s of seth are tooo cute. I have baby Howie with me today and Im enjoying every moment of it. 😉
“More is caught than taught.”That is the best advice on parenting I have ever read. You’re a fantastic mother.
Great post! Wish I had someone to help me make muffins!! You have a great family and they have a great mother!!
Please read up on the vaccine. The nasal is made with live vaccine and shouldn’t be used around pregnant women. The injection’s are not a problem though. Sorry for poking my nose in……
Precious post ~ and the pics of Seth are just so CUTE! He’s gonna be a funny one, I think ~
GREAT post Shanda! I think my favorite part of it was the last two pictures! How cute is he??? And what training for your boys – to teach them to listen to their sister – even about “dumb ‘ol doll stuff”. Their wives will rise up and call you blessed :o) I look forward to the years ahead and our visit to Boston – never been, but I SO want to go! Blessings!
Great advice here! I loved the “The Mommy Years” so much! Now it is so rewarding to stand back and watch my children live and to see the fruit in their lives. I pray my girls will be good moms who enjoy their children as much as I enjoyed them. It sure looks like my oldest is loving her little guy. He is a few months younger than Seth. I love that photo of Seth “helping” you make muffins! Grace’s new doll sounds lovely. I had a little Indian doll when I was a kid. She had a leather fringed dress, and a papoose on her back. I made her a tepee, a canoe and all kinds of other stuff. I played with her until the rubber bands that held her joints together broke! I don’t think she was very expensive, but I loved her.
Beautiful post Shanda. I bet all those boys are wishing this next baby is a girl. lol
Thanks so much for the advice. I love the Seth pictures. He looks like he is in his glory with all that test tasting. I loved your story about training Ethan to listen to and look at stuff for his sister. What a great training moment.
Thanks for the wonderful thoughts…I love your thoughts on parenting – I would add my own 2 cents…When people ask me what my thoughts on parenting are, or why I “make my children do chores” – I always tell them that I have to remember that I am raising adults not children. I don’t want my children to be 20 years old and not know how to do things for themselves. I want my children to explore and make mistakes while they are still in my house and while I can help them through those decisions.
@tkperito – I read this on the CDC website, “Can family members or other close contacts of a pregnant woman receive the nasal spray vaccine?Pregnant women should not receive nasal spray for the seasonal or 2009 H1N1 flu vaccine, but it is okay for a pregnant woman to be around a family member or another close contact who has received nasal spray flu vaccine.”@colleena146 – I don’t know how I forgot to add the importance of chores to my little list! I don’t know what I would do w/out my children’s help in that area! Thanks for adding your 2 cents………
I loved this post! So heartfelt and such down to Earth good advice. I agree with all you said and you put it so beautifully!
loved it~ and the picture in the elevator is my favorite.Seth is too cute.. I could eat him up. He’s already coated in flour!! ;)happy weekend girl.
on tuesday, i was inspired by your simple and lovely nature treasures. on wednesday, i admired your honesty and truthfulness. on thursday, i was touched by your husband’s words. and today, i am loving how you love your family. you really cover it all, shanda, and that’s why we love you!
your blog is such an inspriation on so many levels. thank you for sharing.
I so agree with Connie…what a blessing you are! So wonderful that you all went with Grace for her birthday purchase, and that you told them to listen to her…so much boy stuff all the time, it is good to show love to this time for Grace. I love the Indian girl she picked out. We played Indian a lot growing up as we had Indian skirts and blankets and baskets. I very much agree with all you have said about parenting and loving your children. Seth is just too cute. I cracked up when I opened the post and saw him laughing. Sitting on the counter helping is just too too cute. He looks like a dolly helping you. I am glad you researched about the vaccine, cuz I was worried about that with you Pregnant. May the Lord give you strength, grace, and a blessed weekend.
Wisdom … pure and simple.
that is such a beautiful and wonderful view on children and motherhood 🙂 your love for your children and interest in them as little people makes your blog a joy to read, even for me, a 20 year old university student with no kids on the horizon!
“The brothers” is the term that my daughter uses to refer to her brothers too. 🙂
Love your advice on parenting. Great words of wisdom. I agree 100%. (not that it is always the easiest road to travel). Great post!!
Okay Shanda, you made me cry. What a sweet family you have. My Grace loves Kaya also. She read the series on her and loved it. Seth helping on the counter is priceless. Loves his little booties~~Cinnamon
thanks for the parenting advice — and o my goodness the pictures of seth on the counter are so so cute. you seem like such a fun mama =)
Good post, Shanda…Good stuff.RE/going to the dr: I waited until I was four months along to go the last pregnancy. The dr kept asking me if I was sure about the dates…over and over, I answered yes.The next month she asked again….and sent me for an ultrasound.Should have known something was up.Like two babies instead of one.:DI had never even considered that possibility.Oh my!Hope you will be feeling chipper again. I always loved the second trimester.
Oooo, I hope I’m not stepping on your toes, but I agree with the previous poster – please, please do further research on the vaccine. 🙂 LOVE YOU!
what fun pics! oh, this reminded me to remember the girl things in the midst of the dominating boyish things sometimes. 🙂 this is a sweet post – I like the daddy daughter shot – reminds me of the days I was that age and my daddy is / was so dear to me.blessings!lys
Ah! An American Girl store! My girls (who have taken an interest in Grace) asked what you were doing for her birthday. I told them I thought she went to A.G. store last year or the year before and my girls said they hoped you took her again this year! We have Samantha and Kirsten, so I loved your doll pictures.Many wise words on child raising. I told someone today, “My husband and I want our children around us, which is one reason we homeschool. We didn’t have children to send them away all day or to their rooms to keep them out of our hair!”
Steve and I laughed when we saw Seth on the counter, this was such a good post! You do enjoy your kids so much! I love that about you!
Thank you for this post and the reminder to ENJOY my children. I always try to act excited and snuggle my kiddos when they wake up from naps….it’s a bit more difficult to do in the morning, lol! I love how real you are! These things are attainable things that I can do to enjoy my children more. My 2 1/2 year old son loves to “help you” in the kitchen too. Seth looks so adorable up on the counter and the elevator shot is such a fun idea!
I wonder if Rich reallys knows how fortunate he is to have a wife like you you there mis-Shanda- One that enjoy’s being a Mother And his Wife -Did you really let Little Seth dig in the flower while baking, And if so Did the others when that small have the same privilege?Your Mothering words really are what a wife should be an do–But seeing them in Print –It sounds pretty Awesome–GOD BLESS
What an encouraging post! Thanks for the wonderful reminders.
Kitty
I loved reading your encouraging list. I may come back to this in the future. I agree with all of it. It breaks my heart to see so many children growing up that have been given everything, now expecting everything, and have not a clue of love, gratitude, work, cost, the how-to, etc . . . Thank you for being such a good Mom. You are changing the world for the better!
A lovely blog. Love your photo’s esp the family portrait and your little kitchen helper!
What a joy to visit here today…those pictures of Seth with his hands in the mixing bowl are gorgeous…you can tell that you enjoy your children…that is so important, especially when they are young…the years go so fast, mine are 18 and 19 now and I still enjoy them…and will miss them when they end up going to college far away!
Another wonderful post. I was just having a little pity party myself because I wanted a few moments. . . by myslef. It won’t happen though, the children are all home and underfoot- and just looking for my attention. Why not? They love me, they’ve been at school all week – and I have the audacity to want a little peace? Sheesh. I read this post just in time.
What a wonderful post! My girls love AG, looks like such a fun time!!
Such good advice. I’m going to save that and read it over and over. 🙂 I LOVE the pictures of Seth helping you bake! Priceless!
I’ve always wanted to go have lunch at AG. I guess I’ll have to take one of my friend’s daughters…I don’t think my boys would enjoy it . I’ll have to drop them off at Cabela’s or something manly.Once again, you have made me cry. I’m so thankful for your straightforward posts.
From the very first picture to the very last, this post made me smile. Wonderful words to dwell on today. Thanks, Shanda! You all are making beautiful, family memories together! Praise the Lord!
Hi Shanda….Love the pictures! Thats funny you clean so the maids can clean. Thats something I would do too…lol! That is so true!! TRAINING IN LOVE…..I drive lots of young mothers in my taxi each day. I’m amazed at some of them of how young they are with lots of little ones but they talk to them LOVINGLY and they are well behaved children. Then I get the others who are in the same situation but who snap or CURSE!!! their children. Or are disciplining them for trivial things. They are just being children. They aren’t being bad. My 16 yr old daughter does not like doing dishes. She grumbles and complains. But when she comes to the kitchen in that kind of a mood or attitude I make her go back and tell her to walk to the kitchen with a smile on her face and she has to come into the kitchen smiling. IT WORKS!! makes for a better atmosphere. Then all she can do is laugh and get the dishes done….KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK SHANDA!! You are a good mommy!!!! 🙂
This post blessed me so much. Thanks!!!! Sometimes I feel so “different” than everyone else. When I read your posts I feel like there is someone else that I can relate to. The girl thing, my sweet girl is in the middle of 5 brothers, and I get a lot of outside pressure to send her off to get her girl time. Well, I don’t want to send her anywhere. She has friends and gets some girl time, but for the most, we all love being together. I LOVE having her here with me. She does just fine with her 5 brothers. Anyway, you blessed me. Thanks!!! ~ Deborah